Im Erica,and this is my story....
Back in 2018 i met this man on my work he is a cute and funny man,i didnt know that meeting him will be the start of my Love. he made me feel special he gives me a lot of efforts,he show me over flowing love we been friends and turns into lovers. he been my partner in everything we made a lot of memories good and bad, we have a series of fights and make ups. for almost 5 years he been my shoulder to lean on, he been my ray of sunshine, he gives me strenght when im weak. for almost 5 years we celebrate birthdays together chirstmas and newyears. we laugh at all the jokes we cry and hug,we broke up kiss and make up. talk about our dreams together,share our favorite foods go to places that weve never been before.we did a lot of crazy things together. everyday i always pray to god that this happines will never end. but one day the most scariest day of my life comes. he feel out of love, one day he wakes up and he didnt love me anymore,that day while waiting for him to come i just receive a message saying "let's break up" that day I was in shock. I ask him why and what happen? and he told me he wants to break up with no reason. I cried and cried beg him to give me answer, beg him to take me back but days pass weeks and months I don't receive any answer to him. at first I thought oh maybe this is just like our breakup before maybe he will come and knock on my door again and will tell me honey let's make up, I'm sorry. But I've waited and waited until I get tired. I question God about my worth, I get angry everyday I can't eat, I can't sleep and if I sleep I always wakes up and feel empty, my body is shaking my anxiety is eating me up. I pray to God "lord please give him back to me, let us be okay" but he didn't listen. Every night I cried to God to please give him back. I love him so much and I can't let go of him. Still God didn't listen. I became a monster I isolated my self to everyone I try to hurt my self until one day my parents called, worried and crying telling me that everything will be okay, telling me to go home. That is the time that I realized no hongchi is not my home he is just like a apartment for rent my real home is my parents. Then now I realize God take him away from me to realize that I hold on for too long I shouldn't settle for bare minimum, I am worth it. Now I pray to God and tell him lord I'm letting go of him, I'm letting go of everything, I trust everything in you. God please heal me, heal my heart so when the right time will come when the right man will come, I can give him the whole me, my whole heart. This time he will treat me well he will show me my worth and he will give me love that I deserve. Now I come to realization that God separates us from the things that not really meant for us to give way of his biggest blessings, new beginning a new life and a new life. Sometimes endings are God form of blessing.
