➹ LEFT TO LOSE ➷ chishiya s.

➸ CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

And yet, after all this time you still remember Ippei, not too clear but enough to see a boy shining an innocent smile change to a lone corpse lying in blood. Although you reminisce on it often, you're glad you didn't forget him.

"What's on your mind now?" A mumble followed with the rustling of sheets interrupted your journey down your short memory lane, though not disappointed at its source. Chishiya's eyes were now open, though his eye lids still hang dangerously low for him to stay awake any longer.

"The games," You sighed, falling back to his side on the bed. "Arisu and Ann have already left to participate in some, we should too."

Chishiya balled his hands up to rub his eyes, now sitting up to prevent himself from drifting away mid-conversation. "We still have extra days left on our VISA."

"I know," You looked down at your journal to trace your finger along the cover. "But completing a game a day earlier could save someone's life."

Chishiya eyed the object along with you, "Or it could end yours."

Your eyes flicked up at him through your eyebrows, though he didn't look away from the book. Slowly but surely during his recovery, his pessimism attitude is making a comeback, and you don't know if you should be grateful or disappointed at the short-lived grace period.

Although you didn't want to admit it, he was right, the risk of either of you dying is just growing with each passing second. Not only were the games dangerous, but most of the people who've survived this long only did because they're also dangerous. People like—

You felt a hand brush against your arm, yet the gentle contact made you retreat your arm back. Your eyes darted up to the owner, as if you forgot where you were and who the only possibility it could be. "Y/N," Chishiya's eyebrows were furrowed, though not because he was confused, but because he was concerned. "Are you gonna be okay?"

You didn't answer within that following pause, you just stared at Chishiya's hand frozen in the air. You felt awful, even if he understood why you pulled away, why can't your body trust his touch? Why does your body feel the cold touch of Banda rather than Chishiya's warmth? They were nothing alike, you have to keep telling yourself that, but why are your mind's instincts the same for both of the guys? You want Chishiya to touch you, feel you, hold you. But, the drawback is imagining Banda being the one to touch you, feel you, and hold you.

"I—I'm just," Your voice broke, swallowing your nerves and hopefully your upcoming tears. "I'm just terrified of running into Banda again." You slowly intertwined your fingers with Chishiya's, not tearing your eyes away so you know whose hand it was. "But, you'll be with me, so I know I'll be fine."

Chishiya didn't reply, he just admired your features from close up. You both sat in front of each other on the twin-sized hospital bed, legs slightly touching but hands connected completely. After a minute listening to nothing but the hospital static, Chishiya put his free hand over yours. "Love," Your eyes flicked to his immediately from his use of the nickname, yet his eyes filled with sorrow. "We can't be in the same game, It's too risky."

Your grip on his hand loosened, almost falling completely numb. He was right, completely right, and you hated that. With how drastic these face card games are, most games have only a sole survivor walk out, never unharmed at that. You don't know what you'd do if you were put in front of Chishiya and ordered to kill him for your own survival. Would you be able to do it? Would he be able to do it? Or would you both just sit there until lasers shot through your skulls?