𝗕𝗨𝗟𝗟𝗘𝗧𝗜𝗡 𝗕𝗢𝗔𝗥𝗗 .. 00 （✓）

FIFTY-EIGHT

"holy shit," june suddenly breathed out, eyes trapped on his features. jaemin looked up from his phone and tipped his head slightly to get a better look at the girl beside him.

her rosy cheeks made him laugh. "what?"

juniper slapped both hands over her eyes. "holy shit. you're, like, actually so ethereal. like, how did we—" she looked around to see if anyone was listening and struggled to sit up enough to bring her face close to his, "—how did we have sex?"

the last word was whispered, as if it was some terrible secret, but jaemin felt brush rise up his neck as he suddenly chuckled. "how?" he asked, almost playfully.

juniper nodded and scooted closer to the boy beside her until his breath hit her lips. "how."

without much thought, jaemin's fingers touched the skin below juniper's jaw, his gaze flicking haphazardly between her eyes and her mouth. "you're high."

"so are you," she uttered, leaning closer as his grip tightened slightly. her hand fell against his thigh, and she watched with a smile when his throat bobbed. "you liked it, didn't you? the sex?"

jaemin swallowed hard but couldn't tear his eyes from the girl before him, touching him. "it was more than just sex to me, june."

"it could have been," she reminded him, suddenly feeling sober. the smile was still on her face despite the hint of sadness in her voice. "you weren't ready. and that's okay! we wouldn't have worked out. not like that."

jaemin couldn't stop himself as he asked "why?", his one hand now cupping her cheek and the other moving to hold hers on his thigh. "why not?"

letting her head drop forward, juniper lifted their clasped hands just enough to brush his knuckles against her lips. "because as much as i liked to pretend that i was, i wasn't ready, either." she sighed against their hands. "we both deserved more than what we could give each other."

"what if i'm ready now?" jaemin said, and juniper looked up to find him in a sort of daze. "would you be? would you... with me... would—" he wasn't able to finish, because against her better judgment, juniper pulled him closer and closer until their intoxicated lips touched.

it wasn't like the last time—the first time. before, it was just them. just june and jaem; drunk, horny co-workers with no description of right and wrong. now, it was different. now, they were juniper and jaemin. now, they had things to lose.

and now, when juniper's phone lit up with an incoming call, she was able to pull herself away.

"hello?" she breathed out, turning away from the swollen-mouthed boy in front of her.

"hey, is it alright if i stay at your dorm tonight?" eric asked, his voice a bit perplexed, like he was mentally trying to piece together whatever was on his mind. "i just got kicked out by sunwoo and karina. did you know they're, like, together?"

juniper bit her lip as a pang of guilt pierced her chest. "yeah. i'm with yoshi and soobin right now, but it's unlocked. i'll be there in a few."

"alright, thanks." and when june was about to hang up, eric cleared his throat. "hey, are you okay? you sound kinda... weird. need me to pick you up?"

"i'm okay. we had a bit to drink, that's all." she spared a glance at jaemin, who was leaning back on his hands and facing his lap. "see you soon."

june stood and adjusted her shirt after hanging up, fighting the urge to look at the boy beside her.

"you know, you could have just told me you were seeing someone else."

"i am not seeing anyone." juniper defended, her tone coming out a bit harsher than she meant. "i wouldn't do that to someone. to you." she paused and knelt to tie her shoes. "i'm not yuzuki."

jaemin's head snapped up, his eyes wide. "what?"

"nova told me." she sighed, fingers lingering around her laces. "i don't know why you didn't."

"it's not sometime i like to talk about."

juniper turned to face him again, her fingers coiling themselves in her hair as she fished a hair tie off of her wrist and pulled it back. "i know. and i'm sorry. no one deserves that."

"yeah, well," he didn't finish, and juniper didn't ask him to. "get home safe, june."

the girl bit down on her lips to stop herself from saying anything she'd regret. it shouldn't have ended like this. hell, it shouldn't have started at all. still, june didn't have it in her to do anything other than grab her bag and head to the door.

"you too, jaem."

•
hellooooo idk how i want to end this