Gateway Drug | Volume II

GD: Volume II | Part Two

It's currently hiding under my light wash jeans, but it's still there.

The person responsible for it is long gone — my mind not even grouping together a sober and clearly thinking Nikki in with who he is when he's on a days long drug binge.

I like to think that Sikki is still crawled up hiding away in our Van Nuys home, scratching around inside the walls, tormenting the new owners, and I hope he stays there. Far, far away from my husband and our growing family.

Once we get to my house, I'm unlocking the door, tip toeing incase Monroe's asleep, peeking around the wall of the living room to see he's laying in Tansy's lap, the two of them asleep while the shower runs in the guest bathroom.

"Aww." I whisper, motioning for Axl to come here.

He does, seeing at what I'm seeing, and his eyes might as well turn to hearts.

Axl and Tansy reminded me of myself with Nikki when we got together that first time. Except Axl was the one blindly and immersively head over heels, and I think Tansy loved him, but was also very in love with being borderline worshiped and adored — which was something she hadn't experienced in any relationship.

Axl's fuse with Tansy lasted a hell of a lot shorter than my fuse with Nikki, however.

She fell off the wagon a few times between '89 and '90, and by '91 during an ugly argument between the two of them, she had confessed to Axl that she resented him for isolating her from her friends, and that she and Robbin had been hooking up, again.

He threw a piano out the upstairs window of their mansion, and threw her out of the house, too (quite literally), and started dating Stephanie Seymour...but that was short lived and they reconciled before Tansy took her mom and her former modeling agency to court for the shit she endured thanks to them.

I carefully bend down to pick Monroe up, managing to not wake him being that lately he's been sleeping so heavy that an earthquake didn't even budge him last week.

He's laid down in his Sesame Street themed crib, his chubby cheeks smushing into my hand as I lay him on his back and tip toe out of there.

I assume Duff's in the guest bathroom being that his brand new Corvette is in the driveway.

A shit ton of us are set to eat a late lunch at his house in a few hours, being that not many of us have been over there since he and Mandy bought it. It's just down the street from mine, nothing big or extravagant, but it's a nice house.

Dad offered to let Monroe stay the night with him and mom so me and Nikki could enjoy valentines tonight...I think he's secretly hoping I have another baby as soon as I can so he can have one grandchild in one arm and one in the other.

I just can't see Nikki and I have a baby together right now — I'm just now getting my body as close to where it was before I got pregnant with Monroe.

Grabbing some water from the kitchen, I head back to the living room to see Tansy's trying to get woke up good enough to get her head on straight.

She had agreed to help me and Mandy get the food ready for tonight, Vince and Tommy are supposed to be at Duff's to help him and Stevie grill some steaks.

I expect Heather to be there since Tommy's coming and it's a couples dinner after all, but it also won't surprise me if she can't make it due to filming.

Nikki's supposed to be dragging Mick and Emi, too, but I don't know if he'll succeed at that.

None of us have all been together since the leg of the Girls tour that Nikki and I nearly killed each other on, constantly.