mortified

canvas stretched to a thousand

spectators,

forced under the pressure of my mind,

self-inflicted shell craters,

the disappointments of my past attempts,

career endings and

desperate exemplifications.

dry paint strokes fill the page,

only empty calories left to power my brain,

the last link to join the chain-

my heart sinks.

head bangs against the wall,

the critics, they've come to take it all

my envisioned image, lost in space,

the puzzled looks,

lines on my face,

mortified.