Welcome to Paradise

Chapter 3

Tik, tok, tik, tok.

That was all Wendy heard as she lay enveloped heavy, medical blankets. 

At first, the gentle noise had given her peace. Now, it was driving her mad.

 She hated hospitals. No, she didn’t hate them. She despised them. 

The colourless walls would bore her beyond recovery, and the constant nervous pacing of the nurses would continuously agitate her. 

Wendy did her best to not look at the large gashes that covered her body from head to toe. Some of them had crusty yellow edges around their rims, while others simply showcased bulging red flesh. None of them looked healthy. 

But that in itself wasn’t bad. Wendy was used to being hurt. She was used to being injured, to having to ignore the aching pain for the goal to make it out alive, to survive. It was the fact that she herself had made the injuries. It was that by itself that gave Wendy icy shivers every time she thought about it. 

She hated it. She hated what she had done. But a small part of her, the tiniest, the most miniscule part of her knew she would do it again. The worst part of it was that she knew it was true. She knew. She knew that she would plunge a knife into her heart in an instance for even just a minute in that paradise. 

It drove her more insane than the loud ticking of the mechanical clock that hung on the wall. 

“Wendy.” 

She didn’t even need to look at who it was. Sammy. Of course.

“Not now, Sammy. Please.”

“Get out of bed.” 

Her tone surprised Wendy. It wasn’t harsh, but it was commanding. 

Shakily, she pushed the blankets off. The floor was cold, but it was better than the suffocating heat of being trapped under those thick covers. 

Without a word, Wendy followed the younger girl through the long maze of dark hallways. She followed her to the automatic door that led to the outside world. She followed her through the shady alleyways that were carved through the tall, unstable apartment buildings. 

The walking, the aimless wandering continued, until Sammy stopped abruptly. 

She turned around. Her face looked pale, almost emotionless. 

“Why did you do it?” Her aquamarine eyes bored into Wendy’s, demanding an honest answer. 

“I wanted to go back.” She replied, her eyes staring back blankly into Sammy’s.

“Back where.” Sammy didn’t sound confused, not even curious. Just plain. Like all the prior emotion had been ripped out of the simple sentence, making it just words. Barren words, without meaning.

“Heaven. Paradise. Limbo. Whatever you want to call it.”

Sammy fell silent for a second, before continuing.
“I want to go there too. Bring me with you.”

Wendy felt a small shock run through her body.

“I-I can’t.” She answered.

“Why not?”

“I…” Wendy hesitated. “I hurt myself to go there. I can’t have you hurting yourself.”

Sammy scuffed. It was a harsh sound, almost angry. “You’re selfish, you know that, Wendy. You think I, you think we don’t suffer every time you hurt yourself to go to that ‘paradise’ of yours? You could have died! The whole world isn’t just about you! If you die, you’d be up there in that little world of yours, or whatever it is, living your best life. But where would we be? Right, in this world, suffering. Suffering because you killed yourself.”