Feelings??

Hope

I've made it through today...
I'm feeling proud of myself...
I'm feeling so good ryt now...
I guess, I've becoming a better person since that day...
I guess I could make it through like this, until the day I can free myself from this maze...
I will be out soon...
So soon....
Keep going myself...
You're so strong we both know it...

That's what I've been telling myself all this years
But the truth is I'm not...
I'm not proud of myself...
I'm not feeling good at all...
I'm not becoming a better person, I'm just getting worst...
I'm not gonna be out from this maze...
I'm not...
As long as I'm alive, I would be tied by them until I die...
I'm not strong as we both believe we are...
But at least, please survive, dear me...
Cuz there's still a little hope deep in us that are still hoping for a better day
That still believing in that daydream we've created to feel better...
I know it sounds impossible, but let's still believe in it and keep going...
I know you feel like giving up, but, don't you remember that person whom you wanna create memories and history with, even from afar and without them knowing?
Cuz you feel more than happy when it comes to them...
Everything related to them already make you smiling like an idiot...
Think about them whenever you feel like that...
So that it could make you keep going...
Yeah, it may hurt a lot, it may shed tears a lot
But don't you just feel satisfied when you create histories together along with the freaks?