Rants of a Girl With an Above Average IQ

What Is It?

So here's something new. Emotion. What is it really? Science tells us that it is a mixture of chemicals and hormones and electrical impulses in our brains. But how can that be? How can something so complex be reduced down to three little things? How can the high and low and inbetween and numbness and pain and laughter all be just these automatic responses in our heads and bodies? Is it really that impossible to believe in something more?

Like depression. Whereas I do believe part of it is chemicals I can also say that most of it is just thoughts. Hour own or someone else's. These thoughts just sort of pop up. I'm lazy. I'm fat. I'm ugly. I'm stupid. I'm unorganized. I will never be anything. This is too hard. It's too much. Make it stop. These are all thoughts I've had on several occasions. Sometimes, I listen. I nearly committed suicide because of thinking how much easier giving up is. But at the time, I wasn't sad. I didn't shed a single tear. I was bored and numb and so I credibly tired of everything but I wasn't sad. So how does science explain this? Wishing to die without motive?

Or love. How do scientists explain love. The truth is they can't. They don't what causes it in us other than an usage to reproduce. They don't know where the joy of hearing from your boy/girlfriend comes from. They don't know why it hurts to break up sometimes. They just don't know. There is so much that science can't explain.

So don't just take science at its word.