The First Glader

George

"I would have made sure he made it, even if it meant I didn't."

"You're saying you would have sacrificed yourself for someone you just met?" Minho continued arguing.

"It doesn't matter how well I knew him. Everyone that comes up in that box is family. Unless they do something to betray our trust, I will fight for them to the death. No matter what it takes." I said, starting to walk to the homestead. "Tell fry he's cooking for one less person tonight. I can't eat anything."

"Millie," Newt tried, but I kept walking. I heard him talking, but I didn't listen. When the voice got closer, I knew he was following me. I ignored him and went straight to our room. I collapsed on the first bed in the room. I knew it wasn't mine because mine was against the back wall, but at the moment, I didn't care.

I felt a hand on my back as I cried into the pillow. "Millie, it's not your fault."

"Not my fault? I've never seen anything out there. Ever. For me, it's day three hundred twenty-five, Newt. I've been here three hundred twenty-five days, thirty of them I was alone, and I've never seen that before. I must have done something wrong."

"Millie-"

"No, Newt. Don't talk." I interrupted. Tears were falling consistently from my eyes, but Newt didn't seem to care. He continued rubbing my back, trying to calm me down. But it didn't help. It wasn't making things worse, but it certainly wasn't helping either.

"Millie, I know you're upset. I am too, but you need to forgive yourself for something you didn't do. You don't need to pin this on yourself, and I think you know that. You don't have anyone else to blame, so you believe that you can only blame yourself. I'll let you in on a secret that I tell myself every time I mess up. It's easy to blame yourself, but you need to learn to forgive and forget. Or at least bury."

"Newt."

"Yeah?"

"That was the worst pep talk I've ever heard, and I've only heard two."

"Well-"

"But thank you for trying. I appreciate it."

"Of course."

"Can you leave now?"

"Yeah, but remember that you are in my bed."

"You can sleep in mine tonight. I'm not getting up for a while."

"But, I can't sleep far away from an exit. It makes me feel sick."

"Then I'll move over. Just leave me alone right now." I sobbed. Newt left, and I stayed there motionless, crying.

I ended up rolling over on my side, so I was on the edge of the bed if Newt didn't sleep in my bed. Then I tried to sleep, but all I thought of when I closed my eyes was George getting dragged along the Maze floor, blood spilling out from multiple wounds across his body.

I tried shaking the thought out of my head, but it didn't work as well as planned. Then I heard a wicked scream. I sat up for the first time in an hour or two. The truth is, I didn't know how long it had been. All I knew was someone was hurt, but it sounded distant.

I raced down the stairs of the homestead and out into the clearing. I looked around and ran over to Alby, trying to calm down some of the gladers. I looked around, trying to make sure everyone was accounted for. And everyone was, except for Minho. "Alby, where's Minho?"

"What do you mean he's right-oh." He said when he realized Minho wasn't where he left him. Then there was another scream louder than the last.

"Help!" There was a pause, and everyone stopped talking. "Millie! HEl-" The voice was cut off, but I knew it was George. I ran over to the Maze doors. They were closed, but they were the ones he was yelling from.

"George!" I yelled. "GEORGE!" I screamed this time. He cried one more time, but it was cut off. Not voluntarily. He's dead. I fell to my knees and curled my head into my chest. Then I screamed. Not as antagonizing and painful or as loud as George's. It was the only way I could let my anger, frustration, and sadness out all at once.

Then I stayed there frozen. I didn't cry, sob, scream, or shake. I didn't do anything. I didn't say anything. I'm not sure how long I was there before someone came to try and move me, but I know that I didn't budge.

"Come on, love. It would be best if you got to bed and rested. You need to sleep." Newt said as he tried to make me stand up. I still didn't move. I didn't even open my eyes.

"Millie, if it makes you feel better, you can come to my room." Minho tried, I think he was trying to make me laugh, but I ended up just blocking them out. I stayed there all night. When I finally lifted my head and opened my eyes, it was sunny out.

I looked around me, and Newt and Minho stayed outside with me. Neither of them was close enough to touch, but both of them were close enough to comfort me if I needed it. I looked straight ahead and realized the doors were open. I checked my watch.

"The doors opened ten minutes ago? But I'm right in front of them, and I didn't hear them." I whispered to myself. I looked down at my shoes and quietly got up. I looked around me to make sure no one would see me leave. Newt and Minho passed out on either side of me. I knew this was my chance.