Alan Rickman Character Imagines

You're Sick PT.2

“Hi.”  He choked out about 40 minutes later when he finally woke up.  

“How are you feeling?”  You asked, taking his hand. 

“Weak, tired.” He coughed.  “Could I have some water darling?”  He asked motioning with his eyes to the pitcher on the nightstand.  You rushed over to pour some in a cup for him. You held the straw to his lips letting him take little sips.  

“In about 20 minutes if you're feeling better I can take you home, but only if you're feeling better.”  You told him.

“I’m okay, they told me I’d feel like this for a couple days after my treatments.”  You took him home 30 minutes later.  

It's been a difficult couple months. Alan had been taking his treatments every other day for the past 2 months but he just looked worse.  He was so thin, there were times you were afraid to even touch him, thinking if you did you might hurt him.  He constantly tried to pull you onto his lap insisting he was okay, but you were gaining weight due to the baby and he was losing weight. As much as you wanted to cuddle up on his lap you knew it would hurt him, he was just too stubborn to admit it. A week into his 3rd month of treatment you had to go back to your OBGYN to check the baby's progress.  Just as before the baby was perfectly healthy…..But you and Alan had decided the week before your appointment that you would ask to know your baby's gender. He was getting worse, and yes the doctor told you things would get worse before they got better but just in case something happened you wanted him to know the gender of your child.

“Everything’s progressing as it should, your baby is healthy and you're looking good.”  Dr Meg told you.

“We have decided we want to know the gender of our baby, would you let us know?” 

“Of course, you're having a girl.”  She smiled at you.  You smiled at Alan, he normally stood beside you at your appointments but today was a struggle for him to even get out of bed, so he stayed seated in the chair beside you just out of reach.  

“Thank you Dr Meg.”  He said.  

“You’re welcome, I’ll see you in a few weeks. Remember you're due in less than 2 months.” She reminded you before leaving.  

That night you were laying in bed, Alan’s head resting on your chest as he rubbed your growing belly.

“At least I’ll be around to hold her.”  He said, not even looking up to meet your eyes.  

“Alan.” 

“Sh, it's okay. I’m so thankful for every moment I have spent with you, for every moment I have spent and will spend with Oakley.  Even if it's not long, I couldn’t be more grateful.” You felt something wet against your stomach. When you looked at Alan you saw the tears flowing down his cheeks.  “I’m so sorry.” He cried. You pulled him closer to you holding him as tight as you could without hurting him.  

“It’s not your fault, none of this is your fault.  She is going to love just as much as I do.” You were crying now too. 

“I’m fighting as hard as I can, I’m trying, I promise I am. I want to meet her, to hold her at least once.”  He sobbed. 

“You will, I promise you will.” You cried into his thinning silver hair.  You both cried yourselves to sleep that night.  

“Get her on the table!”  A nurse yelled. 

Your water had broken minutes before and you were rushed to the hospital to deliver your daughter. You were taken into a room where you spent several hours in labor.  Pushing and pushing for hours delivering your daughter. After a couple hours little cries could be heard from your room. Your baby was here.  The nurse set her in your arms.

“She’s so beautiful.”  You smiled, she had her fathers eyes.  They took Oakley to clean her off and let you rest.  You were so exhausted you felt yourself just drift off to sleep.

“Wow, she's perfect.” 

“I’m so sorry… They didn’t make it.”  Alan’s head shot up.

“W-what?”  He stuttered.

“Your wife, she died after delivering. I’m so sorry.”  The nurse said to your husband.  

“N-no that can’t be true.”  Alan insisted.

 He had just gotten the news two days ago that he was cancer free and you and him could finally have your daughter and still be a family. You couldn’t be gone, if either of you was going to die it should have been him.  

Alan collapsed on the chair beside him, Oakley still in his arms as he sobbed. His wife was gone.  He wanted to be angry at the child in his arms, but when he looked at her she was smiling at her papa.  She had your nose, your smile, he could never be angry at that smile.  He thought for sure God took his cancer so the three of you could be a family, turns out he took Alan's cancer so Oakley wouldn’t be a parentless child.  

“Mommy loves you, I will remind you every single day just how much mommy loves you.”  He wailed as you brought the child closer into this chest. She reached up and grabbed his nose.  Tears still stained his cheeks, but he smiled at his daughter. He was happy. He felt like he had fallen in love all over again.