Fell In Love With My Best Friend.

Summer Time

***
"Are you okay?" Liam asked, when he walked Erica to her door the next day.
"I guess so," she lied.
"Erica..." he said taking a step closer.
"Liam..." Erica said in the same tone.
"I know you well enough that I know you're lying. Why do you think it's your fault about Briana? It's really not. If it's someone's fault. It's mine," he said, trying to look into her eyes.
"How? I mean. It's obviously mine."
"No. I came up with the idea of embarrassing her. It was not your fault at all."
"Liam..."
"Erica. You have no reason to feel bad for her. No one does."
"I know, but."
"But what?"
"I don't know. It's just..."
"Tell me that you don't feel guilty for this."
"I can't."
Liam stepped back from her and looked at her. "Why? Why? What she did was her fault! Not yours. She was stupid enough to get rid of her life! Not you. You are not to blame."
Erica stepped towards him and reached for his hand, but he snatched it away. "Don't touch me."
"Liam...I'm sorry, but I can't help it. I feel bad, and there's nothing you can do about it!" she yelled and ran into her house, but she turned back around to see Liam was standing there showing no emotion.
"What?" he snapped.
"Nothing. I just thought...I thought you were different," Erica said, and with that she slammed the door behind her.

****

Liam sat in his room, and he just kept thinking about Erica. Why does she think that Briana killing herself is her fault? It just doesn't make sense to me. When someone hurts themselves, it's no one's fault but theirs, and I'm speaking from experience. Liam looked up and looked down at his arms and legs. There were scars on his arms and legs from him cutting. He did it the first time he realized he liked Erica. He felt like he wasn't good enough for her, but he stopped a couple months ago because he didn't want Erica to know he did that. He was glad that she didn't get suspicious about him wearing long sleeves and jeans all the time; he couldn't let her see those cuts. Yes I was stupid back then(a few months ago) but at least I didn't kill myself. I knew that if Erica didn't like me the way I liked her, I would've eventually moved on. Liam stood up and changed from his shorts and into his jeans.
He slid on a white long sleeve shirt on, and he slid on his shoes. It's been two days since him and Erica talked, and he wasn't going to apologize over the phone. He didn't think that was right. If he apologized over the phone, he would look like a wuss, and he didn't want to look weak. He walked out of his house, and he walked straight to Erica's house. He knocked on the door, but no one answered. He knocked another time, no answered, but he did hear someone talking. He put his ear against the door and listened:
"Don't let him in."
"Him? How do you know it's Him?"
"Dad, it's Liam. I saw him walking over."
"Oh. I thought you meant God....Wait, why don't you want to see him Erica?"
"It's no one's business, but I just can't talk to him now."
Liam backed away and shook his head. If she didn't want to talk to him, then he would go talk to someone else, and that was AJ and Taylor.

***

"Why are you guys so mad at each other?" Taylor asked an hour later of hanging out with Liam with AJ.
"I'm not. I tried walking over to her house to apologize, but she still doesn't want to see me. It's not my fault," Liam argued.
"You know she's hurting really badly right now, right?" Taylor asked.
"Yeah I know that, but she won't give me a chance to help her. I don't even know if we're dating...The last words she said to me was, "I thought you were different," and I didn't know what to say to that. I really hope she doesn't hurt herself over Briana. That's the whole reason she's upset with me because I tried to convince her none of this is her fault..."
"Don't say anymore, I get it," Taylor said.
"You do?" Liam and AJ asked in unison.
"Yes I do. I know how Liam is feeling right now. Erica just needs to accept the fact that you care about her, and you want to help her to feel better," Taylor replied, shrugging.
"Exactly."
Taylor grabbed her phone out of her pocket and she stood up. She dialed Erica's number while ignoring AJ and Liam asking what she was doing, so she just held up one finger and hushed them.
They silenced as Taylor waited for Erica for answer. "Hello?" Erica finally answered.
"Hey Erica, how have you been?" Taylor asked as if she didn't know anything at all.
"Good, I guess."
"Have you talked to Liam?"
"Nope, he doesn't care about me anymore."
"I totally doubt that."
"Believe it. We haven't spoken in the last couple days."
"What happened?"
"He was being selfish so I broke up with him."
"Erica... I know what really happened."
"What are you talking about? He was telling me how to feel and I didn't like it."
"Erica. You know he cares about you a lot. You're his best friend!"
"He was..."
"You hurt him pretty badly."
"Oh. So you're taking his side?"
"I'm not taking any side. Erica, just listen to me. You and Liam need to talk this out. You need to get over this 'Briana' thing. It's not worth losing your best friend over."
"Thanks but no thanks."
"Erica, please. He has cuts all over!" Liam's head shot up with his eyes opened wide as Taylor said that. "Taylor! How did you know that?" Taylor put the phone to her shoulder and said, "I was just trying to make her feel bad, I didn't know it was actually true," she said as she put the phone back to her ear.
"He has cuts all over himself?" Erica asked, her tone in her voice sounding concerned.
"Yeah."
"Did he do it because of me?"
"I'm not sure. Maybe you should talk to him and find out."
Erica was silent, but that didn't stop Liam from grabbing the phone which caused Taylor to yelp.
"Erica. Look, I'm sorry for everything. I never meant to hurt you! I really care about you, that's why I felt so horrible when you felt bad about Briana. I didn't want you to think it was your fault so you would go kill yourself too," Liam said into the phone, but he didn't hear anything back. Unfortunately, Erica hung up.
Liam sighed and handed the phone back to Taylor. "Sorry," he said softly and started walking off. He heard them calling after him, but he just kept walking. He didn't feel like seeing anyone right now. Except Erica. He was about to walk into his house a few minutes later, but someone jumped on his back before he could put his hand on the doorknob. He let out a grunt and spun around which looked like a dog chasing its tail.
"You're not going to see me since you don't have eyes on the back of your head," he heard Erica's voice.
"Erica?" he asked shocked.
Erica jumped down and stood in front of him. "Yes. The person you don't want to see," she said, looking at the ground.
"Of course I want to see you. I was so worried about you," Liam said, picking Erica up in his arms in a giant bear hug as he felt her smile on his neck.
"I was worried about you, too."
Erica pulled away and looked up at him. "Why didn't you tell me that you've been hurting yourself? Liam, I thought we told each other everything.You're my best friend, and I don't want to lose you."
"Erica, you don't understand."
"Then, help me understand. Did you do it because of me?"
"Kind of..."
"Kind of?" she asked, putting a hand on her hip. "What do you mean?"
"It happened before we started dating. I was crazy about you, and I didn't know how to tell you. I liked you, more than a friend, and I just wanted you to know that. I was scared and thought that I wasn't good enough for you. I thought you deserved a lot better than me."
Erica didn't show any expression at first, but then she smiled and kissed his cheek. "There's no one better than you. You're great to me and for me, and I don't know what I would do without you. Just please promise me something."
"Yes?"
"Don't hurt yourself anymore."
"I won't. I haven't in 2 months."
"2 months?"
"It became an addiction, so I kept doing it. I stopped so you wouldn't have to see them....It's why I always wear long sleeves."
"Just don't do it anymore. You're here. I'm here. We're together. There's no need to do that anymore."
"I know. Thank you for being so understanding."
She just smiled and said, "That's what best friends are for."