Helluva boss x Fem Reader

HELLUVA BOSS S1//LOO LOO LAND

Y/n: that's weird

Stolas: [taken aback] No! No, no-no-no. I'm taking my daughter to Loo Loo Land, and I was hoping you brave little Imps and Beautiful succubus would accompany us!

Blitzo: We're assassins, not bodyguards, 'kay? Don't invite us to shit unless someone's gonna die.

Stolas: I'll pay you~

Blitzo: Pay me what?

Stolas: Moneyyyy~

Blitzo: Done!

[Blitzo hangs up and accidentally slams his phone down on the desk hard enough to smash it to pieces. After a brief annoyed glance at it, he pulls out a megaphone.]

Blitzo: M n' M, get in here! We're goin' to Loo Loo Land!

[Moxxie opens the door to respond.]

Moxxie: Loo Loo Land?

Y/n:Loo Loo land

[Millie excitedly smashes her head straight through the office door's glass.]

Millie: [excitedly] Loo Loo Land?!

Blitzo: Loo Loo Land!

Loona: [offscreen] SHUT THE FUCK UP!!

[Cut to Loo-Loo Land. A van with an I.M.P decal spray painted on the side pulls into the rather empty parking lot. Moxxie exits the van and opens the side door. A very cramped Stolas extracts himself excitedly. His daughter exits the van far less excitedly. Stolas dons an apple-themed hat and gestures toward the park gate. Octavia groans and pulls her hat low over her face.]

Blitzo: Now, remember this is work and work only. Me and my crew are not here to satisfy your perverted bird needs, alright?

Y/n: I don't really care what we do as long as it's not in the eye of the public I can care less.

Octavia: [disgustedly] Hey... Dad... Do we have to--?

Blitzo: Okay, yeah, hold on right there, sweetie. [turns to Stolas] If you try fuckin' mine or Y/n's little ass in that park, I swear to--

Stolas: You are so cute when you are serious!

Octavia: I'm literally gonna be sick.

Moxxie: Oh, crumbs! I knew today would be a lot! What do you need?

[Moxie fishes around in a fanny pack and throws out several pill bottles as he lists off his inventory.]

Moxxie: Antacids? Ibuprofen?

[Moxxie shows Octavia several hypodermic needles of a glowing, acid green substance.]

Moxxie: Morphine?

Octavia: That was figurative, old man.

Moxxie: Oh, right.

[Moxxie chuckles sheepishly as he discards the needles into a nearby baby carriage, where a baby imp happily reaches out to play with its dangerous new "toys."]

Moxxie: [under his breath] But she said it was literal.

Millie: [excitedly] Wooooow! I haven't been to this place since I was a tot!

[A large letter falls off the sign of a nearby ride, crushing the teenaged imp underneath.]

Millie: It hasn't changed a bit. Ohhh! LOOK! It's Big Woobly!

[Millie gestures toward a hideously malformed animatronic dinosaur, which opens its mouth and lets out a terrifying, demonic shriek.]

Moxxie: That is... deeply upsetting.