Helluva boss x Fem Reader

HELLUVA BOSS S1//LOO LOO LAND

Stolas: [bemusedly] Ohhhh! How charming...

[Stolas grabs the zebra meat and feeds it to a massive potted plant situated in a small alcove off the kitchen as he pets it. Sated, it falls dormant, closing its three eyes.]

Octavia: So, you two done screaming for the day? [sips her coffee]

Stolas: Umm...

[Stella lets out another scream of anger and an object is heard shattering in the distance.]

Stolas: You know what I haven't done in a long, loooong time? I haven't taken you to your favorite place in all of Hell! Why don't we go to Loo Loo Land?

Octavia: I'm not five anymore.

Stolas: You always were so happy when I took you to Loo Loo Land! What do you say we go there again, have a day, just the two of us?

Octavia: I'd... rather kill myself.

Stolas: There we go! Anything better than staying in this house. Now, I'll arrange our security.

[Stolas picks up a phone carried on a platter by his now bruised and battered servant.]

Octavia: Security for a theme park?

Stolas: We are rich, and we're hot. People want our money and our bodies!

[Octavia grabs a box of cereal on the table and begins shoveling handfuls into her mouth.]

Octavia: [under her breath] Our money, maybe.

Stolas: Speak for yourself, Princess. Now... I'm calling the only couple who can f*** me!

Octavia: [drops a handful of cereal, disgusted] What...?

Stolas: [hurriedly backpedaling] Who can protect me! Us! Being part of the Goetia family is rather valuable, you know.

[Octavia groans and pulls her hat down over her eyes.]

[Cut to I.M.P Headquarters, where Y/n is on her phone and Blitzo is busy doing very important work in his office, involving crude representations of Millie and Moxxie made out of office supplies that he puppets around and speaks with. Between them is a framed photo of Blitzo with a robe pulled down off his shoulders seductively and a flower between his teeth. The text reads "#1 Bitch" with "BOSS" written in red over it.]

Blitzo: [impersonating Millie] "Oh, Blitzo! You're such a good boss!" [impersonating Moxxie] "Yeah, I really want you, sir." [Impersonating Millie] "Me too!" [As himself] Let's three-way!

[Blitzo lowers his "employees" below his desk to crotch level, looking momentarily pleasured while Y/n just giggles and takes a drink of her tea before being interrupted by the ringing of his cell phone and picks it up putting it on speakerphone.]

Blitzo: [angrily] WHAT?!

Stolas: [lustfully] Why, hello, my big-dicked Blitzy.

[Both Blitzo,Y/n and Octavia spit out their coffee/tea in sheer surprise. Blitzo slams his "BOSS BITCH" mug onto his desk.]

Blitzo&Y/n: What--

Octavia: the--

Blitzo&y/n: FUCK--

Octavia: Dad?!

Stolas: Language, everyone! [into the phone] I have a special request~

Blitzo: Aw... G- Look, I just had a chemical peel,and Y/n just finished with getting over her Cold so you'll have to find someone else's face to plant that feathered ass.

Y/n:Yeah sorry I just need one more day to recover fully

Stolas: It's for my daughter.

Blitzo: Ah. Well, make sure she washes it.