𝐏𝐘𝐑𝐎𝐏𝐇𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐀 | Remus Lupin (2)

(𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐞 𝟏𝟐) ponte vitae

The other problem with the moon was separating the wolves. Athena didn't know what would happen if the two of them collided during their transformations. She worried that their anger against each other would leap to the surface. Athena didn't want to sit back and let that unfold.

Kennedy made everyone slightly tense. Athena liked knowing she was safe but she was beginning to think that Kennedy wasn't fit to stay with a group of people for an extended amount of time. She wondered how Sirius had dealt with her for so many years. Then again, Sirius had been a handful himself.

She loved Kennedy but Athena couldn't deny she was difficult.

However Kennedy wasn't the only one with a shortened temper. As Athena widened with the weight of pregnancy, she started putting up with less and less. She hated the sensation of pregnancy. In fact there was very little she enjoyed about it apart from imagining what would come after it was all finished.

Sometime towards the end of December, she couldn't go a day without feeling a small kick against her belly. At the beginning of this, it had been incredibly exciting. Remus had almost fainted from excitement as he placed his hand on her side in order to feel it. However by late December she'd had enough. Her daughter wasn't giving in, constantly kicking as though demanding a way out.

It was hard to appreciate the intricacies of pregnancy when it hurt so bad. Athena had been under the strange belief that it would only hurt towards the end but the physical and mental changes she was being forced through caused her stress she wasn't aware that she possessed.

She spent a lot of her time sleeping and the rest of her time worrying. Remus kept telling her that stress wasn't good for the baby but it was hard to imagine he really believed she could stop. The war didn't leave times to relax, it didn't give a break to think about oneself. It was a jump from bad to worse all the time. Athena often believed they were heading towards the final stages now. She wasn't sure why she thought that, it just made sense.

Everyday the consideration washed over her. The war couldn't end without her. As long as she ignored the crystal ball and denied her fate, the war would rage on and people would continue to die. That wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for the pressure to be placed on her shoulders but it also wasn't fair that this fight would have no end until she started facing responsibility.

But Athena was scared. What she had told Voldemort may have been a lie but that didn't mean it wasn't one she believed. Dumbledore may have been manipulative but he'd also been smart, cunning. He wouldn't have told Snape and Athena that Harry had to die unless it was the truth. Athena wasn't jumping around the pretence that he had cared for the boy but she still knew he'd been on the side of good. Even if his version of it had been twisted.

Athena couldn't do it. She wouldn't see the death of the boy she swore to protect unless she knew there was a way to prevent it. But as the months drew on she knew she couldn't hold off anymore. A spark had hit her when she'd considered the idea of a sacrifice and now she had to follow through on that idea.

☽☽☽

She spent the majority of her time in bed these days. Christmas passed and the new year dawned on them. Athena had faced many New Years but few had been as dark as this one. There was a constant fog rolling over the hills outside. Kennedy said it was because of the dementors. They could go anywhere they wanted now. Muggles couldn't see them but they could feel them. Athena couldn't imagine how terrifying that must be.