ink - sirius black

grey and healing

"Not as safe as she would be here," Sirius muttered, eyeing the liquor cabinet. "I'm going to go to sleep. It's been a long night."

James bit down on the inside of his cheek as he watched Black leave.

"I'm worried about Sirius," he said once he was out of earshot, voice low and truthful. "Bad."

Euphemia and Fleamont exchanged a glance before he placed a hand on James's shoulder, squeezing tightly. Fleamont didn't know what to say for the moment, just knew that now was one of the times where he couldn't do anything anymore.

It was Sirius's place to make decisions now, and he just hoped they would be the right ones.

"I have to head out," Euphemia said, and Fleamont nodded. "Regulus."

"Make sure he knows he's welcome," James said softly, and Mia smiled. "He deserves a place here just as much as Sirius, no matter what he did in the past. He made his choice now, and we're some of the only people who support him."

"I'll be sure of that, love," Euphemia said, kissing him on the forehead. "I'll be right back."

December 26, 1977
1:01 am
The Leaky Cauldron

Regulus sighed deeply as he ran his hands over his face, staring at himself in the mirror and leaning forward to more closely examine his features.

Grey eyes, black hair, high cheekbones. How could he so easily give up on his family that his face represented, the heritage and blood he embodied and had been taught to be proud of?

You had to give up, he told himself with narrowed eyes. Things have been going downhill for you since the second you sent that letter to Ollivander's warning Anneliese to be more careful. You made your decision then, even if you didn't realize it. You can't turn back.

Regulus looked down at his bare arm, at the Dark Mark resting on his skin.

Sirius was right, he thought begrudgingly. This was stupid. I shouldn't have let myself get this deep. I should have backed out earlier before it came to this. I should have made Sirius take me with him. I should have gone to Dumbledore. Anything but this.

Several horrors flashed through his mind, each worse than the last.

He himself calling people mudbloods, looking down upon everyone else because they weren't purebloods, hurting them without care and full of pride. Being forced to watch as Voldemort tortured an Order member and then killed them. Anneliese's neck covered in bruises.

He turned on the water, cupping his hands and dousing his face in the freezing liquid. A shudder went through his body, at the temperature and his thoughts.

There was no turning back now, he knew that. But god, he wished that he didn't have to pick a side like this.

Black looked up as a knock sounded on the door, front curl of hair still dripping water.

He grabbed his wand off the counter immediately and stood behind the door, pulling the handle open so that he was hiding behind it and could have the element of surprise on whoever was coming in if he needed to.

It was a technique he had learned from Sirius to employ when their parents were drunk.

"Regulus?" Euphemia asked, confused why she couldn't see anyone when the door had just been opened and unlocked for her. "Are you here?"

Black sighed in relief that it wasn't someone coming after him on behalf of his parents or Orion or Walburga themselves, and tucked his wand into his waistband and shut the door behind her.