CC One Shots

All Eyes On Me

Ranboo angst/fluff
TW // Facial dysmorphia

Ranboo sank to the floor of his bathroom. Warm tears started to run down his face. Why. He asked himself. Why do I look like that.

He has been struggling a lot recently with his facial dysmorphia.

The small room was dimmly lit with a shitty bulb that was on the verge of burning out.

His arms hung limp at his sides and his legs were pressed against his chest. His head hung between his knees. Ranboo was breatthing heavy, chest tight. His arms like lead. Why. He asked himself again. "Why." He whispered to himself.

His playlist had been playing in the back ground as he broke down. It cycled to All Eyes On Me by Bo Burnham, a song Ranboo loved and hated, depending on his mood.

Get your fuckin' hands up, Bo sang

Get on out of your seats

Ranboo rested his head against the wall, looking at the ceiling. He was trying to choke back his tears. He hated crying. They seemed to burn his skin. They didn't actually burn him, it just hurt in a metephorical sense. Ranboo sighed.

All eyes on me, all eyes on me

Get your fuckin' hands up

He was breathing hard, chest rising and sinking to the beat of the song. Come on Ranboo, you're better than this. "God no I'm not damn it." Tears were collecting in wet spots of his hoodie, they were cold against Ranboo's warm skin. It almost stung.

The song continued.

Are you feeling nervous?

Are you having fun?

It's almost over

"It's just begun, don't overthink this," he sung softly. His voice was strangly horse even though he hadn't been talking. Ranboo closed his eyes and listened to the song for a minute. His breathing slowed a little, enjoying the music. Bo had a good voice, weirdly calming.

We're going to go where everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody, oh

Ranboo looked down at the floor, he felt dizzy, lightheaded. He held his breath, which hurt. Sharply exhaling, he reached for his phone. He could see his tired eyes in the black screen. Tears spilled over his lower eye lid faster now. Ranboo's lips quivered as shaky breaths went in and out quickly.

He let his phone drop to the floor as he buried his head in his hands letting out painful sobs. Why. Why. Why. Why can't it be different? Why do I look like that? Why can't I like it? Why. Why. Why.

The questions he hated with a burning passion filled his head and spilled out his eyes. His hands were soaked, so was his face. A fire started at the bottom of his spine and worked it's way up his spine. Ranboo started to sweat, overheating.

Heads down, pray for me

His hands dropped, one of his legs slid and laid straight in front of him. "Please," Ranboo pleaded. "Please..."

The bathroom tile was cold on Ranboo's hands, it felt nice. Really nice.

He hummed to the song that still played from his phone. He could almost feel the music move through him. He breathed slower. Tears still fell, slower now, still warm. They stained his face. They were salty.

You say the ocean's rising like I give a shit

You say the whole worlds ending, honey, it already did

You're not going to slow it

"Heaven knows you've tried. Got it? Good, now get inside." Ranboo sang. He stopped crying and looked at the floor he sat on. There were tiny puddled of tears. "Damn-- guh," he breathed. He realized he had been holding his breathe again. He breathed in and out slowly.

He wiped the wetness off his face, the hoodie sleeve was rough on his skin. Ranboo stood up and stretched a little. Looking up, he walked to the counter and leaned his hands on it. Looking over his features again. Like he had been doing for hours.

He looked tired, he hated it. He hung his head again. He didn't cry, he had been crying for too long now, his eyes were sore. His eye lashes were still damp, which annoyed him.

I said get your fuckin' hands up

Get up, get up

i'm talkin' to you, get the fuck up

Ranboo flinched slightly at the sudden yelling. It echoed in the bathroom.

He looked up again. He fixed his hair until he was happy with it.

Get on...

All eyes on me, all eyes on me

The song ended. The room was silent for a second while the next song loaded. Ranboo felt alright. He needed a good cry, he felt better.

The next song started.

Seeeext--

Ranboo covered his mouth as he started giggling. It was a major mood killer to play Sexting after All Eyes On Me, but it made him forget about his face for a bit.

He washed the salt off his face and grabbed his phone. He the swiped the music app away and the room was silent. While leaving the bathroom, Ranboo opened messages.

<Me> hey tubbo
<Tubbo_> sup boess man
<Me> call ?
<Tubbo_> ye a hold on :)

Ranboo smiled, he was okay.

-

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