𝐧𝐲𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚 • draco malfoy (ON HOLD)

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐒

I remember that day so clearly. After she narrated we layed together, kissing, touching and embracing each others bodies. Even thinking about her gets me aroused, like right now.

So I went on to take a cold shower, maybe doing that would freeze my thoughts too. I can't believe I was about to confess to her. But if she doesn't want me then why should I try to talk to her. I'll just ignore her.

Making my way down for dinner, I seen mother, Blaise and Natalia setting the table. On Christmas I spoke to her of where Elnara would go and she seemed unbothered by her leaving. She explained that Elnara would spend most holidays at Hogwarts itself so maybe she wasn't comfortable being in this new atmosphere of my Manor, so she left for school. I never spoke about the note she left because that point wasn't so valid at the moment.

The table was full of delicacies, greens, beans, rice and noodles, cornbread, a whole sitting of roast pork that needed carving, fruits and berries with a lemon bundt cake and eggnog. All this food at my disposal but my stomach rejected.

While everyone joyously plated heaps of food, my plate lay naked. "Go on love, eat up"

Still looking at my plate I replied with no interest, "I'm not hungry mum."

I could sense my friends glaring at me. "What's wrong mate?"

"I'm just not as excited for a new year like I used to be", with that I excused myself and ran to my room, just wanting to be alone.

My train of thoughts started chugging. All I think of was memories with her, those were the only times I genuinely found my happiness. I guess I was wrong about us because loving her seemed like nothing but a losing game.

Two loud knock interrupted me, "Darling, it's mum."

"Come in", I muttered into my pillow.

I heard the door open and close, the bed sinking a little as mother took a seat, her hands rubbed my shoulder to soothe me. "What's wrong my love?"

"Nothing mum, just tired."

She chuckled and said,"I'm your mother, I know when something's troubling you."

Sighing, I sat up with my back against the headboard. "How do you feel when father isn't around?"

She stared down at her fingers with a smile and spoke, "Well, at the beginning it was lonely and I felt betrayed because he spent zero time here and majority elsewhere. But over the years I got used to it. It does bother me a little but I choose to ignore it."

I always questioned their relationship about how that devil of a man got with this angel like woman.

"I feel lonely, mum"

Mother shifted her gaze to look at me, "You admire her, don't you?", she said with sparkling eyes.

I couldn't lie to her, "More than anything", I confessed dejected. "But she left"

"Oh Draco", mother said taking my hand in hers. "Look at me, love" and I did.

"You know, when people love each other not always do they mend a relationship."

"But if the feeling is mutual then shouldn't that be the case?", I asked hopeful yet confused.

"Dear, when you're with some one it's not just a relationship, it's being one with that person. Which means, you'll share the ups and downs of life but sometimes a partner would not like sharing such sorrow", she raised her palm to cup my jaw, "Has it occured to you that she may want to keep you out of her struggles or she isn't comfortable talking or making such decisions."

"What if I want to be a part of her hot and cold life? What if I want to walk the same path she does?"

"She needs time and what you need to do is look out for her, even if it through the shadows."

"She keeps me grounded", I whispered with a smile.

"I can tell, darling, but give her sometime. She'll talk to you as time comes", with a smile and peck on the head, she left.

Narcissa couldn't help but blame her for her sons broken heart.

⚯͛

The bells chimed in glory of welcoming a new year, a sky full of fireworks, and a family of people that cared for him. Mother, Natalia and Blaise shared tons of hugs and kisses, their spirit so full of jubilation.

What he seen next, not only made him feel happy for his best mate but also a tinge of envy. Natalia and Blaise having the most compassionate kiss he'd ever so often thought of sharing with the woman in his mind. He was jealous of how well they ended up, even though it was very predictable.

Walking out to the veranda, I looked into the distant sky full of art and the moonlight creating a canvas for it.

"Happy New Year, love! Fuck I wish could kiss you right now and tell you how much I actually crave for you", I sniffled and wiped an unexpected tear.

"This seems so stupid, me talking into thin air about you but I hope you know how much you mean to me Elnara!"

Although that night Draco wasn't the only one talking to the moon. She was trying to reach out to him too.

***

a/n

i'm so sorry for not updating soon, i've been ill.

i hope you guys are doing excellent, i love you'll and please takecare <3