Bungo stray cats

Chapter 4

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The mission Dazai was sent out on was rather difficult. While it was a hindrance to not have Chuuya simply use his ability to destroy the enemy base, the task was not impossible. It was a tedious three days of studying the tight security before weaseling his way in and planting a bomb.

Of course, Dazai could not bring the kitten on the mission with him no matter how easy it would be to leave it in the charred ruins of the building to fend for itself.

Instead, he had called for a meeting with Odasaku and Ango as per usual when he was going to depart for a few days on a mission. (Just for the last drink in case they were to never see eachother again, though they never vocalized it during their meetings. It was their escape from the Mafia setting.)

All was the same, the dim lighting of the bar and the three vacant seats waiting for them. Well, except for the unwelcome presence of the furball in his arms.

Ango had the audacity to actually laugh out loud when he spotted Dazai walk into the bar, probably looking as grumpy as the cat he was now holding as far away as possible from himself.

Oda raised an eyebrow, reaching out to take the cat and examine it. The thing practically melted in his hold, purring and rubbing against his palms. Stupid cat. "What's this about?"

Dazai took his seat in between the two, a drink was immediately placed down in front of him. "That thing is a creature from hell trying to sabotage me and waste all of the Chibi's time and energy."

Oda pointedly raised a finger to halt his sentence, taking a long drink from his glass before setting it down. It seems that he always needed to be at least a bit intoxicated every time Dazai bought Chuuya into the conversation, as he always downed a whole glass.

"Sorry, maybe try rephrasing that?" Ango asked "I mean, your opinion can't be too reliable, the cat looks pretty harmless."

As if to prove Ango's point, the kitten settled down into Oda's lap, dozing off to the relaxing atmosphere of the relatively silent bar.

Dazai was going to pluck that thing right from Oda's lap and throw it into Yokohama bay.

"Nope, there's a demon in that little body, its demon powers are just dormant for now." Dazai took a sip from his own drink before continuing. "Me and the slug were on our way back to headquarters when we found that thing, in a trash can, by the way. It could have rabies or something."

Sadly, Oda did not throw the thing to the floor.

"Chuuya insisted that he takes it back to his place-"

"..Isn't there a 'no pets' rule for the Mafia apartments?"

Dazai waved Ango off "Yes but that's not the point. Chuuya got sick and demanded that I watch it, falsely accusing me of being the other parent since I found it with him."

"Well first off, does..." Ango glanced down at the cat "Does she have a name?"

"No, but that doesn't matter. It seems I have been thrust into the position of an unwilling Father."

Oda's empty glass was replaced with a full one, and he chugged that one down too. He was really on a roll tonight. Then he turned to Dazai, an unholy glint in his eyes. "Welcome to the life of parenting. You'll have to bond-"

"Ah, the parenting talk is not necessary, thank you Odasaku."

Oda visibly relaxed at Dazai's words, setting the drink down. Was he trying to acquire liquid courage for that talk? Just as he had done for the Chuuya conversation?

Odasaku really deserved a vacation or two with the amount of 'talks' he had brought upon himself to have with Dazai. Maybe he would get him a gift card or something.

"So what are you going to do with her?" Ango looked way too amused to be appropriate for the situation. "Aren't you going on a mission? I'm sure you can borrow one of those baby backpacks to carry her around in from Odasaku."

Oda turned back to his drink, "I am going to pretend I didn't hear that."

"No I will not take it with me, it will get in my way-"

"She, Dazai. Not 'it.'"

"Anyways" Dazai waved Oda off "the reason I called this meeting was to transfer the responsibility to one of you. Who will it be?"

Seeing as Ango refused to raise his hand, after a few moments Oda volunteered. "Fine, I'll watch her for a few days, but in return, you have to promise me something."

"Sure."

"Make a list of names for her and talk over them with Chuuya, help out at least a little, it can't be easy for him to co-own an animal with you."

Dazai decided to ignore the blatant insult, leaving the bar that night catless and with a satisfied smirk on his face.