For your eyes only

8

Louis POV
„Maybe it needs a clean slight between you two so you and him can move on" that phrase has been running through my head probably a thousand times since it came out of Niall's mouth the other day.

I really should do that but I don't think I can do it considering how the last time went. I am not exactly in for another panic attack to embarrass myself.

Liam and I just ended our call and I really wanted to tell him about everything that has been going through my mind but I couldn't.
Telling him just makes it real and forces me to actually do it.

Eleanor is not at home at the moment, I think she is out with a friend doing some shopping so it actually would be a good time...

It's not like I want to keep it as a secret, I am going to tell her about it but not right now. I want to figure it out first.

My phone lights up on the dinner table so I get up and reach for it to read the message. It's a massage from our group chat with Lottie, Phoebe and Daisy we planned to meet up for the weekend and have some dinner together so they are discussing the details right now.

I take my phone with me back to the couch and answer them real quick. Clifford, who just walked in the room looks at me with his head leaned to the side.

He looks so sweet when he is doing that and in the next second he jumps up on the couch right next to me and cuddles himself into my side.

"Wanna help dad a bit over here huh?" why am I talking to the dog again? God what's wrong with me? But let's be honest everybody does that, right?

OK no this is distraction. I need to do this. I take a really deep breath and go into my last calls list searching for his number when he called me the other night.

I deleted his number a few years ago to stop me from contacting him so I couldn't do something stupid when I'm drunk.

There he is. Oh bloody hell. I click *message this number*.

And now? What am I supposed to say?

Hello Harry this is Louis, you know the guy from your band that broke up with you and left you all alone. You want to meet up so you can continue to throw things at me like the last time we spoke?

Yeah I figure this would not be appropriate so I type a short hey. Hey?? Really Louis? That is fucking bullshit. I delete that again and type hello instead.

Wow I am officially a teenager again... I can't even decide on the greeting.

Hello, this is Louis. I am not quite sure if this is actually your number but I figured I just try. Are you still in the US right now? Can we maybe meet up somewhere?

I immediately tap on the *send* button so I can't change my mind any more about this.

After rereading what I just wrote I roll my eyes at myself. What am I talking there, he probably thinks I am stupid. Well I think he already does that and much more so there is actually not much to lose.

Ok now that this is done... what if he doesn't answer? What if this isn't even his number and that was just a random dude the other night??

I need something to distract me, it can take ages until he replies so I decide to call Lottie, I'm sure she can distract me for a bit.

We talk about literally anything for about two hours until I feel my phone vibrating on my ear so I take a look and I didn't actually expected that but it is a message from that very specific number.

"I am sorry Lots but I need to hang up now." I say very nervous to which she answers "Alright no problem I actually need to do some work now, so I'll talk to you later."