Ineffable. [D. Malfoy]

eleven.

Shuffling backwards again her feet stumbled but stopped when her back hit a bulky chest. She stopped breathing

"What the fuck are you doing in here?" a voice growled from behind her.

Her eyes widened immediately at the sound of the voice when she turned, she met the stare of a furious Mr.Malfoy. His grey eyes were clouded, red and full of anger. His eyebrows were narrowed together, his face tight as stone, and his lips sealed together tightly. She gasped, horrified by his expression. She remained silent, eyes falling to the floor. Her throat was dry, and she gulped, trying to clear it but couldn't as fear overtook her.

This wasn't Scorpius's room.

It was Mr.Malfoy's

She felt a cool finger brush her chin, raising it up to meet his glare. Her pulse increased, heart pounding in her chest as he took a step forward towards her. She couldn't move back. His cool finger gripped her chin harder- so she had no choice but to meet his eyes. Her feet remained planted in the ground. "Must I repeat myself? What the fuck are you doing in here?"

"I was- I was just."

"You were what?" he yelled, causing her to flinch back away from his touch. His finger dropped from his chin, eyes clearing from its cloudy disaster, a small look of guilt covered his features for a split second before he returned to looking livid.

"I thought this was Scorpius room."

"Well clearly it's not. Do you think you can just wander around into people's room like that. Your extremely infurigating, damn idiot." He huffed, eyes still locked with hers. Her lip trembled at his harsh words, and tears filled her eyes. She gulped thickly as her hands shook at her sides in fear. He was most definitely intimidating.

"I'm sorr-"

"JUST GO. GET OUT." He roared.

She opened her mouth to speak, but he sent her another harsh glare. "I'm sorry Mr.Malfoy."

Tears trickled down her cheeks. Esme glanced up at him again, now seeing his face take on a softer expression from her cries. She slapped a hand over her mouth hiding her sobs as she ran past him out of the room. When she got to her room, she slammed it shut, sliding down against the door.

She was so stupid. What was she thinking?. She always had to go and fuck something up. Just yesterday, he was being so kind towards her, and she ruined it. She ruined everything. Her sobs got louder, and she pushed her hand against her mouth harder to suppress the ugly sounds falling from her lips. Just then, she twisted her head to look at herself in the mirror. 

Her eyes were swollen, thick lashes wet from her tears, her brown skin was pale, lips dry. Then they slipped down to the rest of her body. She was ugly, and for that, she hated herself. She loathed every single thing about her. Her messy curls, her short arms, lanky and thin. Her thick thighs never seemed to get skinnier, even after starving herself for long periods of time. Her stomach was not skinny, layered with a small amount of fat. She hated herself for looking the way she did. Was that why no one wanted her?. Did everyone saw her as an object that was ruining their life? Was she causing trouble for everyone she knew?

Esme kept her gaze, staring at her reflection in the mirror. Her hands lifted from the floor, fingernails piercing into her skin.

Stop it. Please stop

She pushed her fingernails harder, gripping at the skin. Her flesh was thin, which was why the blood started prickling out fast. Her sobs got louder as she watched herself dig at the skin in her arms.

You deserve this. You are a horrid person.

Stupid, fucking idiot.

She no longer felt pretty. At least yesterday, she did. Mr.Malfoy made her feel like a human, not an object.