It's Doctor

You found me

A/N

So this was the main reason I wanted to start this book because I had a great idea for a one shot that was inspired by this song and it also just lets me vent so enjoy except you probably won't 🤩

TW//
Suicidal Thoughts
Suicide attempt
Self Harm
Depression/anxiety
Vomit

If you feel like your struggling with any thoughts of harming yourself don't hesitate to reach out for help! You can even talk to me it doesn't matter who you are, I'll listen

800-273-8255

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I woke up squinting my eyes to avoid the sting from the harsh light peaking through the windows. Why the fuck were the windows open. I reluctantly and ever so clunkly climbed out of bed to shut the blinds.

I pulled down on the bottom tab of the cordless shades all the way to the base of the windowsill waiting to hear the tap of the plastic on the wood as to make sure the light was sealed out.

I let out a big yawn, not very charming but who the fuck cares. I thumped my way back to bed walking the excruciating three feet. I lazily plopped down in bed draping the sheets over my now shivering body. When I  closed my eyes it was now dark enough for me to fall back into slumber. Thank god for black out shades.

Just as i was about to finally pass off into dream world, i hear the bedroom door open. Feet slapping on the floor towards my side of the bed.  I tried to act like i didn't notice and stayed still. A little too still. The tension in my shoulders and my syncopated breath gave me away. Man it sucked living with a profiler sometimes

"Hey," Spencer said in a hushed tone as to not hurt my ears. He was sweet and considerate like that.

I ignored him and stayed in my position. I added a snore for effect but it was a bit too dramatic and painfully obvious i was faking.

"Y/N I know you're awake," Spencer retorted his face relaxing, dumbfounded.
I just groaned and turned around in a playful manner and he chuckled at my failed attempt.

I curled up in a fetal position as Spencer just scoffed sarcastically and hoisted his knee up on the bed to lift himself. You felt the bed dip with his weight as i tried not to let myself flip over as the bed was quite flimsy and soft.
He curled up right behind me and immediately attacked my exposed neck with light kisses and a few harsh pecks that felt like the kisses my mom used to give where I  would scrunch up my face as she smothered lip gloss on my cheek.

He continued his actions and i started to get uncomfortable and ticklish and i started giggling which only encouraged him. I had now opened myself up for more kisses all over my face.

"Ok, ok! I'm up! I'm up!" I  exclaimed with my achy morning voice.

Spencer's face and tone became oddly serious all of a sudden, "why are you still in bed so late princess, are you not feeling well?"

I sat up with the covers still over my legs while Spencer kneeled beside me. I look around and then at him confused and eyes squinted.

"What time is it?"

"Almost twelve." He said quietly like a loud voice might break me. 

"That's not unusual, I usually sleep in Saturday's."

"Yeah, and you usually stay up all night on Friday's. You went to bed at 10 last night."

I remembered last night.

Spencer wasn't home yet and it was around 5:30. I'd  been home for about an hour and had been lying on the couch after a long day of work just huffing to myself about how annoying all of my colleagues were. I didn't have to go to work often, i mostly worked from home but every once in a while i had to go in and it was hell. They all acted like children and i wasnt in on their little inside jokes. It was like high school all over again.
I had decided to get up and make some dinner for myself so i lugged my way to the kitchen to browse the fridge.