Spiralling Mind

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MY MIND

twists and turns.

Ups

Downs

Days that everything is okay

Days where nothing is

It feels like

I'll never control which one wins

ME

11 years

Depressed

Here's to

11 more

CLOSET

There has been nights

Where I stare at my closet

Inside is release

A safety net

A last resort

It's like staring into a crossroads

I carefully feel the weight of each option in my hands

I try to view it from every perspective

Once choosing there is no going back

I stare at my closet

Imagining one day I'll have had enough

Enough of fighting my one mind

Enough of trying to make everyone happy

Only to feel alone

One day just snap

Walk up to my closet

And take out the 12 gauge

TICK

I fear

Good days

I flinch when they try to embrace me

I see them coming and tremble

But I always let them envelope me

I am useless in a state of bliss

But in the back of my mind

I know

That there is a catch

SEX

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