Helluva boss x Fem Reader

HELLUVA BOSS//PILOT

EDITED[11/2/2022]

EDITED[1/25/2024]

~The scene opens with a city shot that slowly zooms in on the Immediate Murder Professionals building.~

Cars honking can be heard in the background.

The scene transitions to a closed door, with a sign that says

"Meeting in progress".

Inside, Blitzo is walking by a whiteboard on the wall as he lectures his employees.

Blitzo: Alright, now I know business has been a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here. [looks at Moxxie] Moxxie.

Y/n:Haha! loser

[Moxxie gives them a "What the hell?" look.]

Blitzo:Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?

Millie: What about a car wash?

Blitzo: This is hell, Millie. No one cares about cars being cleaned here, okay? Ooh, what about a billboard?

Moxxie: We can't afford a billboard, sir.

Blitzo: Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now.
[pushes Moxxie away] Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?

[Blitzo turns on a TV that shows everyone killing people. Then it zooms out to everyone watching the TV, with Loona, Millie, y/n and Blitzo eating popcorn.]

Y/n: We actually don't look too bad.

Blitzo: Ahh, those were the good times.

Moxxie: I don't need any reminding, sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel nobody watches.

Blitzo: Uh, hey, excuse me. What's "obnoxious" about a super-fun jingle, all right? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit!

Y/n: I would consider that rude if it wasn't 100% true

Millie: People love musicals, sir.

Blitzo: Exactly, Millie,Y/n. And we're basically doin' a musical. Are you gonna crush my musical theater dreams like my dad did?

Moxxie: Sir--

Blitzo: 'Cause right now, all I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside.

Y/n: I swear half the shit that comes out of your mouth is so confusing and concerning

Millie: Are you trying to crush his dreams, Moxxie?

Moxxie: I-- What?

Millie: I thought I knew you.

Y/n :I.... Can you just keep the sexual tension at home..wait what I'm even saying I live off that nevermind keep going loves.