Be My Baby Boy

Dead and Webs

"That was some spicy repartee, Spider-Babe," Deadpool said as they flopped down on the concrete roof of a convenient tall building that New York came well supplied with. Another robbery successfully foiled, and even better, with no casualties. You never quite knew with Deadpool.

"I guess you've rubbed off on me, Deadpool" Peter countered and realised his mistake a moment too late.

"Not yet, but the evening is still young," Wade said and wiggled his eyebrows. "I have rubbed off thinking of you, though, bubble butt. Many times."

How does he do that? Peter wondered for the nth time, watching the suggestive movement behind the mask. His own mask kept his expressions mostly muted. 

Out loud he just muttered, "Not now, Wade. I need a break after that." They had interrupted a group of superhero cosplayers robbing an off license, and it had taken them surprisingly long to subdue them, Wade grumbling the whole time how it was only taking them that long because Peter had forbidden Wade to kill them. 

"Don't you ever get tired —" Peter started and stiffened, raising his head and turning away.

"It wasn't that bad, Webs," Wade whined.

"Yes, it was, but that's not it. Gotta go." Peter thwacked a web to the building next to them and swung away. 

"Bye, baby boy," Peter heard a sad voice behind him and nearly missed his next web, something about that voice unsettling him. As he swung his way toward the disturbance, Peter kept thinking about Wade. Tall and wide shouldered wise cracking Wade who had told Peter his real name and that he was in love with Peter in the first three minutes of their first encounter. Peter had scoffed him, blushing furiously under the mask he had never been happier about wearing. 

The innuendos and outright indecent proposals had never let on since then. Peter had learned to live with it, sometimes having to pluck Wade's big palm from his behind. "A work of art," Wade had whispered reverentially the first time he had copped a feel. Peter felt himself blushing again. Wade was a menace, but he was keeping to his promise not to kill the perps they encountered, just because Peter had asked him to. And he was surprisingly good company. Utterly insane, of course, but in an entertaining way. Peter never laughed as much as he did when he was with Wade. He'd had few reasons to laugh before they met.

Peter's thoughts were mercifully interrupted when he reached the corner where he had heard the scream only to see the woman knee the would be assailant in the crotch and run away. Peter cheered her in his mind and webbed the guy to a nearby building for good measure. He called 911 and left the perp there, swearing the air blue. With the intended victim gone there wasn't much the police could do, but perhaps the experience of being arrested would deter him in the future. 

Peter was about to swing homeward when Wade's sad goodbye came back to him and he hesitated. Wade had never sounded like that before. He was always confident and brash and seemingly cursed with an inexhaustible well of lewd innuendo. Peter had never thought it was anything more than a compulsive need to flirt, coupled with zero filter. But just now...

Peter spotted a small taco restaurant and he swung there before he could change his mind, startling the waiter behind the counter.

Ten minutes later, Peter swung back up to the rooftop where he had left Wade, suddenly feeling foolish. Wade had surely left. But even as Peter swung himself silently over the ledge he heard Wade's voice.

"I know we scared him away, you don't have to tell me!" Wade  said, arguing with the voices in his head, his voice both angry and despondent. "Stupid! Now he will never patrol with me again."

Peter's chest contracted oddly. Before Peter could hear anything more unsettling, he interrupted Wade. "Hey," he said and cringed. Couldn't he have come up with anything original?

"Webs? You came back?" Wade lifted his head from the roof, the white eyes of his mask widening with surprise.

"The lady in distress turned out to be a badass. And I was hungry. So. Catch," Peter said and threw Wade a wrapped bundle.

"You came back and brought me food?" Wade asked, his voice sounding hesitant and elated at the same time, his hands unwrapping the warm paper bundle on auto pilot. "Tacos? You brought me tacos? You remembered?"

Peter snorted. "You never shut up about Mexican food and there happened to be a store just there..."

"You're literally perfect," Wade cooed, the pep back in his voice, and rolled up the bottom of his mask. His mouth didn't know whether to smile first or bite into his taco, so he did both, managing a weird grin and spilling half the taco fillings out from the sides. His tongue darted out and caught the fallout expertly, Peter's eyes following it involuntarily. 

"Get off it," Peter muttered, his face burning, and sat cross-legged next to Wade. Not too close, but not far either. He started to unwrap another taco for himself and reached into the carrier bag with his other hand and handed Wade a beer.

"Marry me," Wade sighed with happiness, his mask doing its very best to contort into literal heart eyes.

"Eat first", Peter muttered, his face hot behind his mask. 

"First ---?" Wade squealed only to "mmmppphhh" when Peter shoved the taco back into Wade's mouth. Like Peter intended, the obscene pleasure Wade got from biting into a taco or chimichanga drove everything else from his mind. Peter's ears turned red as he listened to Wade's ecstatic moans as he chewed. It was quite pornographic.

While they ate, Peter watched Wade, his mask rolled up only as far as his nose and trying to hide behind his still gloved hand. Wade had never shown his face to Peter, not in full. Wade's scarred skin had been a surprise the first time Peter had seen it, but now it was just a part of Wade. Peter had never shown Wade his face either, he was too afraid someone bad would find out his secret identity and target his aunt May, or his friends. And there was another reason. Peter shifted nervously.

"Tacos on a rooftop with my Spider-Babe," Wade said with a happy sigh after he swallowed the rest of his third taco. "So romantic. This is the best day ever!"

Maybe... maybe Wade meant all the flirting? Feeling both nervous and elated, Peter bit into his taco, his eyes on the night-lit city before them. Wade was right. It was romantic. But the view didn't enchant him for long. Soon his eyes moved back to roam over Wade's leather covered muscled body, strewn comfortably on the hard roof. He snatched them back. Surely not. He couldn't be actually interested in Wade? Could he?

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Image source: https://twitter.com/ufopartyy/status/1004748988808130562