𝐅.𝐑.𝐈.𝐄.𝐍.𝐃.𝐒 | 𝐋𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐒𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧/𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄

The One With The Thumb

SCENE 1:

(everyone but Zayn is there.)

ZAYN: (entering) "Hi guys!"

ALL: "Hey, Zaynie! Hi!"

LIAM: "Hey. Oh, oh, how'd it go?"

ZAYN: "Um, not so good. He walked me to the subway and said 'We should do this again!'"

ALL: "Ohh. Ouch.."

MAYA: "What? He said 'we should do it again', that's good, right?"

HARRY: "Uh, no. Loosely translated 'We should do this again' means 'You will never see me naked'."

MAYA: "Since when?"

NIALL: "Since always. It's like dating language. Y'know, like 'It's not you' means 'It is you'."

LOUIS: "Or 'You're such a nice guy' means 'I'm gonna be dating leather-wearing alcoholics and complaining about them to you'."

ZAYN: "Or, or, y'know, um, 'I think we should see other people' means 'Ha, ha, I already am'."

MAYA: "And everybody knows this?"

NIALL: "Yeah. Cushions the blow."

LOUIS: "Yeah, it's like when you're a kid, and your parents put your dog to sleep, and they tell you it went off to live on some farm.

LIAM: "That's funny, that, no, because, uh, our parents actually did, uh, send our dog off to live on a farm."

HARRY: "Uh, Ross."

LIAM: "What? Wh- hello? The Millners' farm in Connecticut? The Millners, they had this unbelievable farm, they had horses, and, and rabbits that he could chase and it was- it w-.....Oh my God, Chi Chi!"

SCENE 2
LOUIS AND NIALL'S APARTMENT

(Louis is helping Niall rehearse for a part)

LOUIS: "So how does it feel knowing you're about to die?"

NIALL: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."

LOUIS: "Hey, that was really good!"

NIALL: "Thanks! Let's keep going."

LOUIS: "Okay. "So. Whaddya want from me, Damone, huh?"

NIALL: "I just wanna go back to my cell. 'Cause in my cell, I can smoke."

LOUIS: "Smoke away." (Niall takes out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He fumbles and drops the lighter. Then he lights a cigarette, takes a drag, and coughs.) "I think this is probably why Damone smokes in his cell alone."

NIALL: "What?"

LOUIS: "Relax your hand!" (Niall lets his wrist go limp.)