Snape's Sorrow

Chapter 5

Author's Note: Yes! I finally finished chapter 5! It's a bit longer and I even added a dream sequence(: Which is new for me, so tell me how I did! Comment, Vote and tell your friends! :D

Snape returned downstairs and surveyed the house. Papers were scattered everywhere and pictures were removed from their rightful place. Books were thrown in every direction, and the furniture was scattered all throughout the house, some weren't even standing anymore, just laying on their side. Death Eaters continued to look everywhere, even in the smallest places. Snape went into the living room and looked around. Bellatrix was there, not even bothering to help look. Instead, she sat by the window, looking out into the night.

            "Voldemort won't be pleased when he sees that you aren't helping." Snape said, wryly. 

            "Oh, like you've done anything besides sulk in Sirius's bedroom." She snapped back at him. Snape could feel the anger in him rising, but brushed it aside.  Snape glared at her, and then swiftly turned and walked out of the room, bumping into Luscious Malfoy.

            "Watch it." Malfoy snapped, brushing his long, blond, hair out of his face and fixing his black coat. Snape just rolled his eyes and tried getting past him, but Malfoy blocked his path. "Where do you think you're going? I came with a message from Voldemort. He wants to speak to you, and by the sound of it, I'm guessing that he isn't too pleased with his...faithful servant."  Malfoy said, with a smug look on his face.

            "Anything else?" Snape said, glaring at him. Malfoy didn't reply, just moved out of the way and into the living room. Snape let out a heavy, frustrated, sigh and went to find Voldemort. Voldemort was in the kitchen, watching Goyle and Crabbe search, again, through the cupboards. Once Voldemort spotted Snape, he motioned him over to where he was standing.

            "Snape, I thought that since you, my faithful servant, would be right about Potter being here." Voldemort said, not bothering to look over at Snape.

            "I believe I said that Potter might be here." Snape corrected, causing Goyle and Crabbe to look, wide eyed, at him. "But I was very well wrong."

            "That you were." Voldemort said, almost as if he was saying it to himself.  He turned his back to Snape and stared out the small window just above the sink. Snape stayed where he was, unsure if he should move or in Voldemort still wanted him for something.

            "Is there anything else you need from me?" Snape asked, looking over at Voldemort, who seemed lost in his thoughts.

            "No, no. I believe we will leave this place and go back to Hogwarts to think up a new strategy. He has to be somewhere." He turned back around to face Snape, and walked out the door, gathering the other Death Eaters. Snape walked to the front with the others and one by one they left Black's home, not bothering to clean up the mess that they had created. Snape guessed that Voldemort wanted Potter to know that they were searching for him, which Potter most likely already knew.  Either way, Voldemort liked thinking he was one step ahead, instead of the complete opposite. He liked thinking he was the one who had the upper hand; the one with all the power.

            After they returned back to Hogwarts, Voldemort dismissed them and retired to his study. Snape sensed that something was bothering him, but shrugged it off. Voldemort was the enemy, he reminded himself.  Snape started moving towards his room, until he realized he was being followed by Bellatrix.

            "What do you want?" he asked, turning around to face her.

            "Looks like you were wrong. Voldemort doesn't seem too please about it either. It's time that his 'faithful servant' was on his bad list too." Snape rolled his eyes, but Bellatrix continued on. "There's something not right with this picture. Who's side are you really on? You lead us to a place where Potter was nowhere to be found, and there weren't even any clues to him being there previously. Now why would someone like you, Voldemort's favorite Death Eater, lead us to Black's home? Something tells me that you knew Potter wasn't going to be there. I think you are a-"

            "Where's your proof" Snape cut her off, anger boiling inside of him. He glared angrily at Bellatrix, who was extremely out of line. "I made a mistake. It happens to the best of us. I said that he might be at Black's home. There's a difference between the words might and know, Bellatrix. And you would very much love to be off Voldemort's black list, wouldn't you? I know how much you might want Voldemort to love you back, but that's not going to happen. Voldemort is incapable of loving anyone." Snape saw Bellatrix's eyes widen, and knew that he hit a nerve.

            "How do you know about that?" She asked, glaring at Snape.

            "It's a surprise that he doesn't know. You act completely differently around him, almost like a teacher's pet." Bellatrix didn't say anything in return. They stood there, glaring at each other, for what seemed like almost an hour.

            "You better listen, and listen carefully Severus," Bellatrix said, her voice filled with venom, "I will find out who's side you are really on and I will expose you for who you really are. And you can be sure of it, especially if you tell Voldemort anything about what just happened." With that, Bellatrix quickly turned on her heel and stormed off, leaving Snape staring angrily after her. Was he worried about her exposing him? Not in the slightest bit. No one would listen to Bellatrix and she was to dim-witted to gather up enough evidence against him.  Snape turned around and went straight for his chambers, fuming at the earlier argument. He walked over to his window and looked out upon the lake. He closed his eyes and rested his head against the window, slowly falling into a deep sleep.

"Snape!"

Snape looked around at his surroundings. He was in a courtyard filled with black, white and red roses. He sat in the middle of it, on a wooden bench that had ivory growing around the arm rests. The sky was black, with no stars or moon showing.  He quickly got up and turned around, trying to find whoever called his name. Then, out of nowhere, a girl with fire-red hair stepped out of the bushes, covered in cuts and bruises.

 "Lily!" Snape called, trying to run over to her, but he was frozen where he stood. He frantically looked around, trying to find a way to move, but to no avail. Suddenly, Voldemort sneaked up behind Lily, his wand pointed at her.

"Lily!" Snape called more frantically, "Behind you!"

It was too late.

Voldemort uttered the killing curse, and Lily laid on the ground, dead. Voldemort wickedly grinned, looking down at the body. Yet, when he looked up, it wasn't Voldemort's face Snape was staring at.

It was his own.

Snape jolted awake, breathing heavily. He put his face in his hands and wept, thinking again about how he was to blame for Lily's death. Sure, Voldemort was the one who actually killed her  but he was the one who gave Voldemort a reason for killing her.

It was just as if he killed her with his own wand.