Denial's Not Just a Feeling

Not Now

   "Morgan?"

        "Mother?"

        "Would you please get your head out of that book for one minute?"

        The young girl sighed but complied with the wishes of her mother. She placed her homemade bookmark in the book delicately, making sure to not harm the pages and closed the book, placing it ever so gently on the opened square of the quilt beside her. She perched herself on her forearms from layign on her stomach and raised her feet to rest on her butt. She patiently waited for her mother to continue.

        "Thank you," her mother muttered. She licked her lips. "Tom is here."

        The young girl perked up. Moving to a sitting motion and jumping from her bed, she slipped on her auburn flat and grabbed her light blue, over the shoulder bag. 

        She walked up to her mother, kissed her on the cheek and proceeded out her room and down the stairs to the main floor. She trailed her hand over the smooth wood of the banister and glanced through her peripherals at the twins talking to Tom. The three boys were laughing hard and snorting. Tom through his head back, she smiled. 

        She reached the bottom and walked over to the boys. 

        She tapped Tom on the shoulder. "Hello."

        He turned around grinning. He bent down to peck her cheek. "Hi. Ready?"

        She nodded. 

        "Moe."

        She turned to one of the twins pushing up his glasses with his middle finger. "Jordan."

        "Moo."

        She blinked at the other twin flipping his long blonde hair from his eyes. "Daniel." He groaned at his name. 

        "Dad says not to stay out late."

        "I will not. You know I never do."

        The boys nodded their heads. "Have fun," Jordan declared. Each takign turns to give Morgan a hug and fist bumping Tom.

        They made their way out of the house, ready to spend the evening together. Tom laced his fingers through Morgan's once they were down the block, out of view of the boys. She smiled at Tom,  wishing she always held her hand more, but knew he respected his friends and her father too much to show more affection than necessary in front of them. She understood and respected it, just did not like it. 

            They walked until they made it to a small cafe. They planned to spend the evening in there talking about Tom going to college. It made Morgan sad to think about it but they had no choice. He was heading off in just a few month. She thought they would be able to last, hopefully end in a marriage, but life had no guarentees of such things . . .

        "Mummy?" 

        Morgan blinked, not realizing she had fantacized about an old life once again. She looked down at the small child who thankfully claimed the only thing resmebling her, gray eyes. "Yes, Daniel?"

        "I'm hungry."

        She sighed, rubbing her stomach, dreadfully hoping this one did not make it. She did not think she would be able to take care of two younger children, but Daniel who good, a very good helper. 

        "Alright."

        She reached into the the cabinet to get some animal crackers. She found a bowl almost completely dry in the drying rack and handing it to him filled with crackers. He smiled at her and scurried off to the table, sitting on his knees to eat over the table. 

        She sighed again once she spotted the time on the clock. His father would soon be home with dinner. She decided to sit at the table and watch Daniel. 

        "Mummy?"

        "Yes?" She took a cracker and ate it. 

        "Why sad?"

        She smiled, trying to clear her grieving eyes. "I am not, sweetie, I jsut miss your daddy but he shoudl be home any minute now."

        He perked up, quickening his pace to eat his crackers. He knew to because Mummy told him to. 

        The door unlocked. 

        She bit the inside of her lip.

        "Morgan? Daniel?" The authority boomed through the four-bedroom home, once tensing her being, now just hatred entered her veins, though she was happy.

        The man walked in the room, a smile lighting up his face. He kissed her on the head and ruffled Daniel's hair. She did not want him touching her son. 

        "How was your day, Birdy?" He turned to her after placing the pizza box on the counter. An exotic bird of red and yellow feathers appeared ontop the pizza box, staring her down with its electric orange eyes. 

        "Well." She looked up at him, seeing him wait patiently for an answer, but his hands were starting to grip the counter. She did not want him to break it again. "I continued teaching Daniel his colors, letters and numbers. I found his favorite to be nine so he skips it when counting to ten. He believes saying it too many times would make it less special, I understand."

        He nodded. The tension in his fingers calming slightly. 

        "And he had started teething on the blanket you had got him at birth."

        His eyebrow twitched. 

        She bit the inside of her cheek, not thinking it was such a horrible thing to tell him since he was following in his father's footsteps and she did not know how to deal with that. 

        "Daniel, leave."

        She looked at Daniel looking at his father. He quickly left the room, leaving behind his almost empty bowl of animal crackers. 

        She looked back at him, his eyes had begun to darken. "I have told you to give him one of the ringlets when you se his teeth starting to sharpen."

        "I am sorry."

        He said nothing. 

        "I do not know how to deal with a transforming . . ."

        He slapped her. 

        She knew she would not be eating that night.