Letters to Someone Special

Letter To The Douchebag Who Sits Next To Me

Dear douchebag who sits next to me,

I know you hate the teacher, but pulling the finger at her behind you desk so she can't see, isn't cool.

If you are a fearless bastard, then I would expect you to pull the finger at her, not behind your desk.

And also, when I'm catching up in my reading that's due next week, can you please SHUT THE FUCK UP?

Yea, I'm new in class and I need to catch up in reading.

I need to complete the book and do 2 fuck-loads of work and your just gonna sit there and talk to your friends?

I hate to brake it to you, but their not listening.

Their reading too ya know?

There's this thing called life, yea, you need to get one.

XD

No, srsly, you really need to get one.

And what the fuck is wrong with your language?

I know I swear, but every second word?

Really?

I know you think your so gangsta' sayin'

"What the fuck is fucking wrong with you, little fuck? You fucking piece of fucking fuck. This fucking work is all fucking fucked up, you fucking mother fucker!"

But really, you sound like a fucking dickhead saying that.

You know, there are other swear words, apart from fuck.

Really!

I would name them all here, but the list will go on forever.

But really, fuck means to have sex with, and no one will wanna have sex with a retard who uses 'fuck' way to much.

If you are reading this, and you want to swear but don't want to turn into this guy, using fuck like it's the only word he knows, then I suggest you google 'swear words' to see the list...

But anyway, back to the fucktard.

I've got to admit, your really funny.

Especially when the teacher tells us to be quiet and not laugh.

I couldn't stop cracking up when you said;

'Jokes are like farts, if you force them too much, their shit.'

I honestly was dying of laughter.

And see?

Shit is a swear word!

Use that!

Oh no, now I'm probs gonna hear.

"What the shit is shitting wrong with you, piece if shit? You shitting piece of shitty shit. This shit is all full of shitting shit, you shitty piece of shit!"

Oh well.

I'm gonna end off with the chorus of my fave song cuz it fits in very well.

It's called 'friendly goodbye' by 'bowling for soup'

Ain't that a B with an itch?

Ain't that a mother trucker?

You can go to H-E- double hockey-sticks,

And F yourself.

Cuz I'm flippin', gosh, darn sick of all the 'S' words you put me through.

So F-U!

F-U!

From Chrissie,

BTW, I have a crush on your best friend.

I think he's hot.

O-O

Baii!