HBV 2: Greetings

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Aaron

It's been how long? Seven fuckin' years since she left us. Hindi ko alam kung anong mararamdaman ko gayong makakaharap ko na ulit ang babaeng ibinaon ko sa limot.

Minahal ko siya ng buong buo at iningatan but I was fooled with her facade. Nasayang lang lahat ng pagmamahal ko sakaniya, I regret being wedded with her.

"Aaron, please," nagsusumamong pananalita nito. I can see the pain visible through her eyes yet it didn't have an impact on me. I just didn't feel the same.

She left without even saying a single word and now, she wants to comeback to our life like nothing happened?

"Are you hearing yourself Joanna?" Pinanatili kong kalmado ang aking sarili. Despite the things she did, I managed to calm my nerves and acted stoic in front of my wife.

She is standing here right in front of me after leaving us behind. I'm nearly speechless. Kung kailan natuto na kaming mamuhay ng wala siya tsaka siya muling mag papakita?

"Please, nagmamakaawa ako sayo Aaron." Simple sentence indeed, pero bumalik lahat ng panggagago niya sa akin dati.

We were a happy couple back then, college sweethearts ika nga ng iba. I thought she was the one but I was wrong.

She left me alone with a child and a single note. Do you know how that feels? I was broken and hurt. I gave her my everything and when she left, everything crumbled.

Muntik ko nang makalimutan na may pamilya pa ako. I got so wasted, araw araw ko'ng sinisira ang buhay ko ng dahil lang sakaniya. I almost gave up on life but I found another reason to continue.

Still, I tried to find her countless times. Nag babakasali ako na baka p'wede pa, maaayos pa namin pero mahirap nga hanapin ang taong desididong 'wag mag pakita.

Ang mga masasamang ala-ala ay bumalik sa aking isipan kaya ang matagal ng naipon na galit ay kumawala na sa akin.

"Bakit Joanna? Nung ako ba ang nagmakaawa sayo nakinig ka?" My voice became so distant and cold. How dare her say that in front of me.

Tanging mga hikbi lamang ang kaniyang naisagot sa akin. Sinubukan kong kumalma muli pero mukhang malabo na itong mangyari.

"Did you even fight for us? I called you that night asking for an explanation, na kahit assurance lang ang ibigay mo sa akin...mapapanatag na ako. But what did you do?"

Ramdam ko ang sugat na unti-unting nabubuksan ng dahil lang sa mga salitang binitawan. It feels awful.

"Joanna, do you know how desperate I was before para lang mahanap ka?" Looking back at those memories made an impression on how weak I was.

"I-i'm sorry," that's all she managed to say. I know that she's guilty of what she did. Tears were continuously falling through her eyes but we know for a fact that her apologies won't change anything.

"You're impossible. You left us. You left without any explanation. You left me with a child alone!" I looked at her as if she was a delusional woman who wants peace.

Her decision broke us. She only thinks about herself kasi kung hindi? Sana maayos pa rin kami bilang isang pamilya.

Ako ang nag mamakaawa sakaniya noon but look at us right now, everything has changed. Siya na ngayon ang nag mamakaawa sa aking harapan.

"P-please Aaron, I'm sorry gusto kong makita 'yung anak natin." Patuloy siyang nakiki-usap sa akin pero ang taong katulad niya ay wala ng puwang sa aking puso.

"Come again? Anak natin? You considered yourself to be a mother? Where were you when she needed you the most?" I gritted my teeth while looking at her. It is too much to bear.

"I need to s-see her. I miss her so much." She had the guts to say that after what she did?!

That's when I had enough of all the dramas that she's presenting.

"Unbelievable! What do you expect? Ipakikilala kita sa anak ko?! After seven years Joanna! Babalik ka at mag mamakaawa, pagkatapos mo siyang iwan sa'kin na parang kung sino na ipinamigay lang? Pagkatapos mong umalis ng walang paalam?"

Words can't explain all the things I wanted to express. Gustong gusto kong isumbat lahat ng pagkukulang niya kay Sofia.

"P-please please I'm b-begging you. I'm sorry Aaron." She knelt down before me but I'm not her prince charming anymore. I just don't see her as the girl I married before. Nag bago lahat noong umalis siya. She chose to break us apart.

"She is my daughter alone Joanna, you may be her biological mother but you've never been a real mother to her."

Her cries were heard all over the place, full of pain and agony.

"I'm tired of your shits Joanna. Sana bumalik ka nung umaasa pa ako na darating ka. Sana bumalik ka noong hinahanap kita." I kept my voice stern and straight. I already forgot her long time ago.

"I'm sorry m-mahal." She said those things softly but with so much intensity of emotions yet it didn't feel the same for me.

Maybe I lost it or maybe I got so tired. I don't know, I am at total lost right now but one thing's for sure...

she's not my Joanna anymore.

"Please, cut the crap. Umalis ka na. No one needs you here." As soon as I utter those words, I walked from her hearing pleas but who is she anyways?

Anong karapatan ang mayro'n siya?

"N-no! Please Aaron, I c-can explain!" Sinubukan niya pa ulit na lumapit sa akin but I had enough. I looked at her for what I wish is the last time.

"Hindi na kailangan. Seven years too late for that." With the right timing, my phone rang for the meeting.

Tuloy tuloy lang akong umalis at hindi na nilingon ang aking asawa.

After all that happened. After the devastation and crushed hopes and dreams that had marked my heart.

I chose to look away.

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