Fitting In Is A Trend

Gossip and Sobs

She walks through the woods when things go wrong.

She glides through the woods when she hears a song

She crawls through the woods to ask and tell

She trips and breaks until she's well.//

Waking up in my bed confused me. I do not remember how I walked through the woods yesterday or how I opened my window and climbed into my room , but I can tell I did because my window was wide open letting in a breeze of summer air. What is wrong with me?

And look, I'm in my pjs.

I wandered out of bed moving slower than a zombie and stumbled to my closed door tripping over clothes and shoes in my room. Before I opened it I smelt breakfast. Like when I was younger and my mom would cook for my dad and I. I'd wake up extra early to wake them and my dad and I would watch cartoons on the couch while my mom cooked breakfast. Bacon, eggs, and cheese on toast, I would always ask. And now I smelt it. Breakfast.

I opened my door and was caught off guard by the brightness of the kitchen. One thing we did have were blinds and we always had them closed. But on this Friday morning they all were open, letting in natural light.

Once my eyes adjusted to the brightness of it all, my mind had to comprehend the fact that my mom was cooking. There she was, cooking and washing dishes at the same time, turning in every which direction to finish the task. The kitchen never looked or smelled any better.

"Good Morning Love." she spoke.

Love? Love is something you cursed to hell at during father's funeral. Love is a word you've never spoken of in years. Why now?

I didn't respond still confused by the sudden difference in grammar. I'm just so used to her calling me a bitch or loser. I walked to the kitchen table which was cleaned off stainless and decorated with napkins and in the center was a pot. A pot with a cactus in it. What the actual fuck?

My mother tilted her head concerned with my face, " What's the matter, you don't like my new friend? I'm thinking of naming him Juan or probably Miguel. You know, because cactuses can be found in Mexico. HA! I crack myself up."

"Ha....," I managed to laugh out. " Where'd you get Juan-or possibly Miguel from?"

"Oh, a friend"

A friend. This can either mean she bought it for herself or from one of her one night stand "friends".

And as if one cue a tall man with no shirt on stride out of my mother's room. He wore white khaki shorts and had a moon tattoo on his shoulder. His hair was long and wavy brown and he had a cigarette in his mouth- unlit. Everything about this dude gave away his age, younger than my mother that is. The usual friends she brought back were old creepy men who had nice cars and fancy jewelry. Those friends never stayed for the morning.

But this dude was different. He didn't look creepy and he stayed for the morning time. Something is not right.

"Babe, you got a light?" His voice was deeper than the ocean.

"Yeah, over by the dresser. In the candle holder" She recalled.

As if he didn't see me he walked over to the table I was sitting at and looked out the nearby window.

He opened the blinds more and marveled at the sky, "Damn, the woods looks so beautiful in the morning. Do you not see that sunlight illuminating the trees. So gorgeous."

"Yeah, it sure is a delight " My mother pondered.

I've never heard my mom have an intellectual conversation with anyone in years. This frightened me in a way I cannot seem to explain.