Part 13- Source of Grief

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“They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of grief is finite.”

Tessa’s heart was aching the next day as she absently stared into the distance, trying to fight the moisture in her eyes as she mindlessly spun back and forth in her chair at the library. Ever since yesterday, her life seemed to be passing in a sluggish blur as she retreated so far into her mind that she was hardly aware of reality. Although she repeated to herself over and over that she didn’t need a guy to make her happy (which was true), losing Will wasn’t only losing someone who would kiss her and make her body go wild, it was losing her best friend. And so it still hurt, no matter what she told herself. 

A light breeze fluttered through the library and she halted her melancholy thoughts only long enough to lift her head, her gaze narrowing to focus on the double doors. A silver-haired boy was hovering around the entrance, his eyes scanning the room for something, someone… His gaze met hers and he smiled, making his way towards her desk until he stopped right before her. 

His silver hair was falling in his eyes a little and as he pushed it away, she was shocked to find that his iries were the same startling color as his hair. His face was angular and defined—he was beautiful, to put it simply. 

“Hi Tessa,” he spoke softly, lightly, the smile never leaving his lips. A memory tickled the corners of her mind but she couldn’t put a finger on the familiarity of his face, voice…

“I’m Will’s best friend, Jem. We met that first day in the library,” his eyes twinkled knowingly and Tessa felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment. 

“Oh, of course! It’s nice to meet you—again,” she spluttered, and her voice sounded strained even to her own ears. Jem flashed her a reassuring smile, and she released a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, some of the tension leaving her body. She took another calming breath before continuing. 

“How can I help you?”

“Ah, well you see,” Jem gave her a sheepish smile, “It came to my attention yesterday that Will has been, how should I phrase this, acting like an asshole.”

Tessa almost choked on her own spit, but then shrugged. It’s not like Jem was wrong. 

“I know Will can be difficult. And by all means, give him hell for treating you the way he did by leaving you in the dark and not explaining anything. But things are always more complicated than they seem, and you deserve to have answers. I don’t know if answers will make things better or worse between you and Will, but it’s up to you to decide what to do with them.”

Tessa’s eyes widened but she nodded her head, wanting to understand where Will was coming from at least, what seemed to be plaguing him. She cleared her throat before speaking. 

“Would he get mad at you for telling me?”

Jem leaned forward across the counter towards Tessa. “Nah, but it might be best if you didn’t tell him I was here,” he confided, a blush staining his cheeks, and Tessa couldn’t help but laugh. 

Will always spoke so frequently and fondly about Jem, that Tessa felt as if she knew him personally, and so she willed herself to be at ease, as she knew this was someone she could trust and confide in. 

But as Jem pulled back, his expression grew serious, a dark cloud pulling over his features. 

“Ok,” he sighed, as if not knowing where to start, and the atmosphere instantly turned somber and grim as he began to speak. 

“I guess I’ll just get straight to the point. Will’s always been distant from most people. To put it simply, he’s had really, really shitty luck and has always gotten the short end of the stick in life. It all started when he was young, when his sister died, because he blamed himself for everything. His parents blamed him too, and so when he started to get in trouble—believing his life to be worthless as his guilt plagued him—they kicked him out of the house. And then he met me.” Jem gave a small, sad smile, and a haunted look entered his eyes, one filled with regret and sorrow. 

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