Lost In Confusion (On Hold)

Want You

Do you ever think that you are not doing enough?

Like here I am sitting in class doodling this beautiful rose on my paper, and out of nowhere, I feel like I'm not doing enough, like as if this whole world is giving us so much but I am taking everything for granted and not admiring every single thing this world gave us.

I feel like I want to do something about it, but what can an eighteen year old do about it?

Yeah... Nothing.

Go get drunk stupid.

Oh no thank you, never again.

You'll wake up next to Jay Jay tho.

Shut up you stupid tempting mind of mine.

Getting me out of my thoughts, the bell rang signaling that the day is over.

Everyone is so excited about the weekend, making plans and talking about the huge game taking place tonight at the school field, I've heard they've been working so hard all summer with training and all to win this year, hopefully they will.

Sadly, I won't be there to see them either win or lose.

See since my very amazing ex-boyfriend, Jason stopped playing for the school's team; I had no more interest in watching the games.

While putting my stuff back into my locker, I think of all the things I might do tonight, maybe watch one of many series I've been missing out on.

Or read the books I've been so impatient to read, or maybe, maybe just sit with Noah, next to the fireplace and eat baked potatoes with my favorite barbecue sauce!

"Are you coming tonight to the game?" Sarah asked me while I was walking my way out to get to Noah's jeep.

"Nope, I'm busy tonight, I've plans." I said, trying to squeeze out of Ryan's hold on me, after he caught up with us and draped his arms around our shoulders.

"Comon Minna, I'm playing tonight" Ryan tried.

"You play every night, no pun intended." I smirked, stopping to give them a sincere answer, "You guys know I don't like watching the games since the accident, so please, accept the decision I made that day." I tried, giving them an apologizing smile.

When Sarah wanted to speak again to convince me, Ryan stopped her saying, "Let her be, she made a decision, we have to live with it." Sarah sighed and said a simple goodbye, held her boyfriend's hand and walked out of the school building to Ryan's car.

"That was harsh."

"What are you doing here? Ears dropping?" I asked Jason who was catching up with me while I walked out of school.

"Maybe, maybe not." He smirked, his breath tickling the little hairs close to my ear.

"Stop that." I said annoyed. Whenever I try getting away from him, he pops out of nowhere. And he turns the charms on, speaking closely to my ear, and tickling me with his hot breath that turns on the desire into my body.

"Stop what?" He tired it again, his smirk getting wilder even.

I pushed his face away from me, "That."

"Okay, okay, I'll stop. But uh Minna, I am driving you home sweetie."

I stopped in my tracks and looked him up and down, "No? Why?"

Jason rubbed his neck and looked away, I looked that way and found my brother in the field warming up, to start training.

"Oh." I sighed.