Chapter 17

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"Don't twirl me like a princess. I'll kick your ass." 

Shut up Seb. He asked you if he could kiss you. Just get on with it.

"Your eyes are really gorgeous. I want eyes like yours. Are there places which make coloured contacts nearby? If there are, are they good? Also is your hair naturally that colour? It's really good, don't get me wrong but how often do you have to dye it? And how is it so soft? I mean if you dye it constantly, isn't it supposed to be rough and porcupine-ish. Is it a special conditioner?"

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

"Back to the topic of twirling me.." 

Raven effectively shut me up,thank heavens, when he pulled into a bone crushing hug, his chest heaving. Panic set in at the thought of him crying. Great. But when a tiny giggle escaped his mouth, I whacked the back of his head.

He was laughing. Full blown, rolling on the floor kinda laughter. I would have been happy if it wasn't for the fact that he was laughing because my dumb ass self couldn't shut up. 

How could I do this to myself? Every person who had a crush would be cursing me because of my ability to lose a great opportunity like this. 

I heard the second shout from the living room a few seconds later, effectively cutting off my humiliating mental image montage. We decided to cut off our, technically 'my' conversation when a thud followed the shout. Running out the door with the hopes that no one was getting murdered, I took the nearest object with me for protection which turned out to be a baseball bat. 

At least, my subconscious isn't a complete mess like my stupid ass self who rejected a kiss from their crush. Freaking bone-head.

I heaved in relief when it was just my mother shouting at my dad for burning the food. There was smoke engulfing the living room which cleared when Raven swiftly opened the windows. When all of saw the mess in the kitchen, it was decided that ordering food would be safer. After a call to the nearby pizza restaurant, we took up the task of cleaning the mess which dad had created. 

He had set the food on fire according to my mom. That explained why it was charred to the core. After what felt like an eternity, we were sat in front of the television, stomachs growling at the sight of hot cheesy pizza. 

It was also the first time Raven sat away from me during dinner and it felt weird. The thought of him ignoring me hurt like a bitch. But when our eyes met, he would grin. Grin at the fact that he could set my entire being aflame with just one look.

It only became worse when he noticed that it wasn't just his look but also his touch which gave the same effect. 

Our hands met when we had reached out for the last pizza slice and I blushed hard at the contact. Stupid teenage hormones.

It was touch after touch and an hour later I was exhausted by the cardio his contact gave me. 

And the smug guy across the room knew it. Ugh!

--

It was midnight and I was tossing on the bed. Raven was fast asleep on his side of the bed. We had a long day planned, go job hunting yet again and then join my parents in the evening for some classic movie that they wanted to re-watch. They were movie buffs, especially when it came to the classics. 

My parents always made time for each other, making it a monthly routine to go on a date and relive the magic. When I was born, I was included as well for a part of their date. Usually it used to be dinner but since Raven was now living with us, they were trying to integrate him into our routine. 

Sighing, I tossed again facing the handsome man on my side to see him awake as well. 

"Had a nightmare?"

"No. Just thinking."

"Must be something important with the way you keep rolling about. Your kicking woke me up." He joked and I let out another sigh. 

I kept thinking about the almost kiss, the kiss we would have had if I hadn't ruined the mood. My happy thoughts about it turned into fear when I thought of how people would react. I wished they wouldn't. I wished that it was considered as normal as every heterosexual relationship. Then came the thought of me having to come out to my parents and friends and after seeing what happened with Raven, I couldn't.

"Sorry. Go back to sleep. I think I'll work on homework in the living room for a while." 

I sat up and so did Raven. He put his palm on my cheek and I leaned into his touch, closing my eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. Not right now." I could feel him move closer to me and I opened my eyes to look at him. He watched my face contort into a frustrated one and dropped his hand when we our staring contest became too much. 

"Fine. I'll go back to sleep. Wake me up if you need me." With a half-smile, he looked away as he started to lower himself back under the covers.

"Raven?" 

He glanced back at me, his eyes widening in surprise at the proximity of my face to his. Without hesitation, I put my lips against his.

I would think about the consequences later.

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