Under The Moonlight

Chapter 11

We were in my room and the silence was almost tangible. Raven had wordlessly followed me into my house and  after a small acknowledgement from my parents, he walked into my room leaving me at the door as I tried to remove my shoes without falling. I liked how he had become comfortable being here, like it was his own space.

I sat beside him on the bed waiting for him to talk about what was going on. It took him a few minutes to slightly un-clench and relax.

"Are you going on a date with Laurie tomorrow?" His tone was strained and hurried. It was almost as if he didn't want the answer to that.

"What's going on? You've been quiet the whole day. Even at karaoke. If you did not want to come, you could have just said so." I exclaimed in slight anger. I had been worried the whole time. It was unsettling to see someone who embodied the sun become so gloomy.  

"Are you going on the date Seb?" He asked again.

"No. I'm not. I couldn't go out with her when it occurred to me that there is no possibility of me ever liking her." My voice raised. My temper had gotten the better of me.

"Okay. I'll leave now then." He said, making his way towards my window and I instantly grabbed hold of his arm.

"You're not going anywhere until you tell me why you're behaving like a puppy which has been deserted." 

My grip on his arm increased and I waited, yet again for his response. It was after what seemed like hours that Raven spoke.

"Can I hug you, Seb?"

 What? My worry started to increase exponentially. He never needed to ask for a hug.

"Of course, Raven. You don't need to ask." 

He abstained from waiting for another second and I was pulled flush into his chest. He was crushing me, clutching onto me like I was his lifeline. He nuzzled against the side of my head and what was supposed to be a friendly hug was now venturing into a whole new territory. However, I did not budge. I wrapped my arms around him, patting his back, trying to soothe him and most probably failing at doing so.

We stood in each others arms until a loud thudding noise erupted from Raven's room. We both looked towards the house alarmed and after giving me another nuzzle, he left.

--

Thanks to my new found crush, I found it hard to sleep. My mind had turned into mush. Knowing that I would have to face Raven tomorrow made my stomach twist in slight anticipation, but the majority of what I felt was fear. Fear of what would happen next. Fear of not being accepted. Fear of being different. 

I sent Raven a text hoping he would reply. After waiting for solid fifteen minutes, I huffed, throwing my phone to the side.I needed sleep to escape from the worry which was eating me inside out. 

I would just have to suck it up and face Raven when he woke me up. 

Raven did not turn up the next morning.

He did not show up in school as well. Another fun fact, Raven was never absent. There was this one instance in which he was running a fever. He looked like a zombie, adorning dark eyes and messy hair and when he was asked to go home by the ethics teacher, he blatantly refused. He passed out soon after and had to be dragged home. 

I jotted down his absence to him being sick again. I sent him another text asking if he was alright and then went about my day. 

--

It had been a week. A whole week and no sign of the idiot. There were no replies to the incessant messages I had sent him and that probably due to the fact that they weren't even read. On the third day of his absence, I almost froze my ass off as I stood outside his window knocking but to no avail. 

The only plus point was that I had time to figure out my feelings. I spent the first two days in denial and the next three days battling my inner thoughts. By the fifth day, I had succumbed to the feelings. I missed him terribly. I wanted to be in his warm, comforting embrace again.

It was day seven and Mark decided that we needed to go out for pizza and I did not even try to resist when I was dragged along. My mood was officially in the dumps and I had made the fact obvious. I was now the definition of a walking thundercloud. 

My mood perked up when I smelt the deliciousness of pizza and groaned in delight as I stuffed myself with the cheesy goodness. A couple of jokes and slices later, I felt much better. Wrapping myself in my coat, I blew some air into the night, watching it materialize as grey mist. 

I came to a standstill in front of The Smiths' residence and could feel the hollow feeling creep back. Pinching myself, I ran into my home, slamming the door in the process. Mom gave a glare at the action and I shrugged. 

"Still no sign of the kid, huh." It was a comment directed towards me by my dad but I dismissed it as I splayed my limbs on the couch. My parents had borne the brunt of mood swings the past week and I felt a little guilty about it. I had some serious making up to do once I got my feelings in check.

My legs were pushed off as my mom ushered me into my room ordering that I needed to freshen up before dinner. Locking the door behind me, I turned and gave a shout in fright. There was a dark figure on my bed and when the lights came on, I instantly knew who it was. 

He was bent over, his hands in hair. He looked up as the lights turned on and nothing could ready me for what I saw. There was a bruise near his lip and a tiny cut against his cheek. He immediately looked away, twiddling his thumbs anxiously. I sat down in front of him trying to get him to look at me and when I finally got him to do so, it was like a sucker-punch to my gut. 

Raven had been crying.