save me

•14•

"Bro! Zion! Wake up! You are having a nightmare!"

Someone is shaking my body and I bolt up super fast. I'm sweating like crazy and I feel like I'm going to throw up.

"Are you okay? You were shaking like crazy and you are super sweaty," Nick says.

I look around. I'm in the hospital still. At the waiting room. I'm here. Not dead. I'm alive. I didn't kill myself. My breathing gets heavier and I start panting more.

"Is she okay?" I ask.

"I don't know," he says, "They haven't said anything yet."

"How long have I been out?" I ask him.

"Like an two hours. You just started freaking out though and I figured it was bad dream."

I nod my head and I run my fingers through my hair. She's fine. She's alive. Not dead. I'm okay. Holy shit. That was the worst night nightmare I've ever had in my entire life. I really thought it was real.

The double doors open and I see Ivy's doctor come over to us. He stands next to my chair and shakes my hand again. "You are able to go back and see her now. She is in room...." Please don't say 613. I don't think I'll be able to handle that shit. "Room 402."

I let out a sigh of relief. Thank God. I smile, "Thank you, doctor." He nods his head, smiles and walks back to the desk.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Nick asks. I look around to my left and my right and I realize that the boys aren't even here. They must have left when I fell asleep.

"Where are the other three?"

"Getting food at the cafeteria," he says.

I nod my head slightly, "Uh, actually. I want to do this alone if you don't mind."

He smiles and pats my back a few times very lightly, "I understand, man. I'll be out here waiting."

I smile and I stand up from the chair. I go through the double doors and I start walking down the hallways while looking at each room number. The hospital is very big and there are lots of people around. People are talking, some yelling, and I hear some people crying. That's going to be me crying when I see her beautiful ass.

I continue to walk until I see room 402. I stand right outside of it for a few seconds and then I open the door. I close it and I turn around to look at her.

There she is. Laying there so helpless and so fragile. There are tubes in her mouth and nose and tons of machines surrounding her. She has wires connected to her chest and her neck keeping her alive.

I come closer into the room and I sit down in the chair that is placed right next to her bed. I take her hand into mine and I bring it to my lips. I give her hand a few kisses and I don't let go of it.

"I'm so sorry, mamas," I say as I feel tears start to roll down my face. "I'm sorry this happened to you. I should have been there."

I look away from her for a second and I feel my bottom lip start to tremble. I never thought a girl would make me feel this way before, but I was wrong. I'm so damn in love with her that I can't help it. I look back at her and I decide to lay my head lightly on her chest. I wrap my arms around her as the tears spill out of my eyes.

Why can't she just hug me back? I want her to hug me, but she can't. She can't do shit and that's my fault.

"I love you, ma. Please wake up. Please come back to me. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."

[3 days later]

"No mom. She hasn't woken up yet," I say to her through the phone. My mom has been calling me everyday for updates on Ivy. She is freaking out about it. I can't seem to get into contact with her parents though because they don't have phones. I'm just waiting for one of them to maybe call my number, so I can answer. My mom is doing what she can to find them, but we don't have any luck yet. "I'll call you right when she does though."