This Song Is About You - Niall Horan Fanfiction

Chapter 11

Niall's POV

So please don't ruin this again.

The words kept swinging in my head, over and over again. I watched her walk away, frozen on my spot. The worst word was that "again", friendly reminder that I aready messed up once with her. And pretty bad. But how could I resist ? Holding her when she was crying had felt so different but so right at the same time, fooling around had been so natural... Yes, for a few hours, I had forgotten everything and had just enjoyed my time with her. How stupid I was.

-Niall. Hey, Niall.

I should've waited. Take it easy. After all, it had been ten years. She had changed, I had, we both had. But she was the one who got hurt, so badly, while I was happily living my dream. I broke her, and I thought I could just... What ? Put everything aside ? Just pretend that nothing had happened ? Man I screwed it, again. Again.

-Niall !

My head shot up and a really worried Liam was looking at me, his nose brushing against mine.

-Stop thinking so much, Ni. You're not helping yourself.

-Yeah, tell me about it Liam, I snorted.

I pushed him back and went to the kitchen, grabbing some biscuits. I poured myself a glass of milk and sat at the table, taking my head in my hands. I just wanted to disapear. Or find Narnia and go hide over there. But I barely thought that was possible. I was interrupted by a crazy Louis shaking me like I was some kind of milkshake.

-Okay Niall. Here's the plan. You read the letters, you have a huge talk together, you both shout, scream, cry or whatever, end up hugging, then kissing, then you live together happily ever after !

I looked at him in disbelief. What the hell was he thinking ? That things were that easy ? And most of all, why was he trying to be the matchmaker when there was nothing to match ? Sure, Cassie was beautiful in every way possible, but she hated me right now, and she had all the right to. I was dreaming of her becoming my friend again, how could I think of more ? No, there were no ways I would,.. Date her. It sounded too odd.

-OI !

I was startled, did Louis just... Slapped me ? Okay, maybe I was dreaming, this was all a sick dream, and I would soon wake up in my bed. Yeah, that was it. I was gonna..

-Niall ! Go read those damn letters now !

Forget about a dream, I was living a nightmare. I sighed, finished my glass of milk, and got up. Louis patted me on the back before ruffling my hair. Typical.

-Good boy.

I didn't say anything, feeling quite miserable. I've been carrying those letters everywhere but never dared reading any of them. I was so scared. It was like, the longer I refused to read them, the longer I could fool myself about the whole situation. But I wasn't alone in this, and I had to stop being selfish. Which was hard.

-Oh, and Ni ?

I was half way through the staits and didn't stop to listen to Louis, who was probably about to tell one of his stupid jokes.

-She doesn't hate you !

He shouted, and I heard him just before I shut my door. She didn't hate me ? Well if that was true, she was more incredible than what I thought. Which was a lot. I went to my suitcase and carefully took the shoebox out of it. I had put the letters back inside in the correct order, the newest letter on top. I sat on my bed, and picked the last letter. That was it.

Dear Niall (that's how a letter is supposed to start, but I don't like it. Can I do it my own way ?)

HEEEY NINI ! (woah that's much more nicer isn't it ?)

How're you doing ? London is awful. It's like they don't even know what grass is. Dad told me there was a parc near our new flat, but he didn't take me there. I haven't started school yet, so I get to go to the hospital every day with Dad. And let me tell you that it's the best thing ever ! This hospital is HUUUUGE. Like no joke. I'm allowed to go almost everywhere - hmm does that reminds you of a movie ? Well it does to me.

I miss you. So much. I know I only left two days ago, but it feels like ages. It's not fair. Sure, life's not fair, we said it countless of times. But now... I really know what it means. So I'm telling you. Life's.Not.Fair.

Dad just said that I should've sent you a postcard. Oh well, next time.

Hope you didn't get yourself into trouble without me, you promised you'd stay good.

Love you baby cake

Cassie J

I took a long breathe. I didn't know ten-years old could write like that. But again, it was Cassie we were talking about. She always was better than rest. Even if the first letter was probably the easiest one to read from all. Swallowing hard, I took the second letter in my hands. I was going to be a long, very long night. But I needed to do it, I had waited for too long.

It was nearly 6AM when I finally turned the light off. I had a tear stained face, I felt like I could never cry again, like all my tears had gone that night. And I had this heavy weight in my chest that wouldn't let go. That night, reading those letters full of hope, love, confusion, hate and desperation, I had lost a part of me. A part of my innocent childhood. And gained a new one, like a thorn stabbing my heart every time I moved. It hurt, it hurt so damn much. And knowing that Cassie had gone through more than a million times worst wasn't helping at all. I never knew how I managed to fall asleep after that, but I didn't want to wake up and face Cassie after that. How had she been able to look me in the eyes, speak to me, laugh with me ? Me, being the selfish prick that I was, hadn't noticed a thing. WHich made me think, did the boys noticed ? Oh God, sure they had. Liam had to, he was the sensible one, who always knew everything. Zayn might've had notice, but he would never say anything. Then Harry... Maybe. I wasn't sure. And Louis... Well obviously yeah, he went to talk with Cassie. Why did that sentence hurt so much ? Sighing, I pulled my blanket on me and closed my eyes.

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I am truely sorry for not updating earlierl But as no one is complaining... Oh well.

Please, pretty pineapples please, COMMENT. I really wanna know what you think about it all .__. I mean is it worth something or should I just stop ?

Yeah, anyway. I have been over the moon for a few days. I went skiing with my dad. And District3 tweeted me. Crazy right ?

I love you all, thanks for reading ♥

Fanny x