Impurity

Memory

Chapter 5: Memory

I admire Eli’s passion for art, but I’m finding myself agreeing with Alma. She was kinda right; what about his grades? He obviously couldn’t be passing all of his classes with years worth of angel drawings all over the house. But then again, I have no right to judge so I guess I should support Eli and his artwork, and hope I can inspire him to work harder in school. “Axel, pick a color” Eli said looking at a large collection of colored pencils which were sprawled all out on his bedroom floor.

“Um red?” I said and he smiled.

“I knew you were going to say that,” he said pulling out thirty different shades of red. “But which one Axe?” He asked.

“Good golly!” I gasp looking at all the shades. Never have I ever in my life --- as far as I remember --- seen so many shades of red. You have your light red, regular red, dark red, and everything in between that. “How about this one?” I ask pulling out a flame color, and he nodded.

“Thanks Axel” He said starting to color in his picture. The picture had so much emotion in it --- the fire in the back round, and the crowds running around and a angel in the middle just floating above them. The anger, and grief just all over the place. --- it just makes me feel like I’m sitting there watching all of this chaos happen.

“Eli,” I say and he looks up. “How long have you been drawing?” I ask looking at his extensive collection on his wall.

“I started when I was seven, a couple days after we moved from that awesome place” He replied.

“So when you are drawing all of these angels, where do you get the inspiration from” I ask looking at the unfinished picture.

“Feelings, ideas, and sometimes I just draw out of boredom,” He said. “But now, I just feel more angry than ever. It’s my mom, I mean she’ll just keep talking to me about my life as if she really gets me. It just makes me mad how she talks about my obsession with angels.” He quickly added.

“That reminds me of something, but what?” I thought to myself. “So have you and your mom always been like this?” I ask and he shook his head.

“We used to be really close, until my dad died when we moved. And I guess she blamed me” He said, his eyes clouded with emotion and pain.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry” I quickly apologize.

“Its okay, I kinda brought it on to you”

It was dark when I woke up, very dark, just a pit full of darkness with no trace of light. I sit up slightly, looking around the room full of nothingness, until I spot two tiny lights. Underneath of me, I could see a tiny blue light and Eli’s alarm clock which read 5:00 AM. “Eli, are you awake?” I whisper leaning over the edge of the bed.

He looks up at me “yeah I’ve been up all night, what’s up?” he asks.

“Why did you stay up all night? I mean you have school tomorrow!” I asked and he shrugged.

“I don’t know, I couldn’t sleep so I just drew.”

“I’m going for a walk. You know take a look around” I say feeling my way to the ladder then climbing down.

“Oh yeah, when you went to sleep I separated my clothes with yours now. They’re under the big red head picture”

“Thanks Eli” I smiled pulling on some fresh clothes.

About ten minutes later I stepped out of the house and I just felt bad for no reason. Well, I could be running away from them, but what good would that do; I wouldn’t know where I’m going. Suddenly something popped in my head, “I’m sneaking out!” Wow, I can’t believe I’m doing that! I shrug off the feeling and start walking aimlessly.

After about five minutes of walking I hear a splashing sound, so there must be some a body of water around here. The noise grew louder as I walk in the direction of the noise and soon later I come across this beautiful lake. It must be the lake Eli was talking about earlier. It’s just so big! I plant myself down on a tree stump and take a handful of rocks. I flick them around on the inside of my hand, and then throw one.

There’s something off with the water. I had just thrown a rock into the lake and instead of a thousand ripples coming from there, a head appeared. Man I must be hallucinating, cause I don’t believe a head can come out of a lake like that. Now before I start screaming my head off and throwing these rocks into the lake, I must say this guy does look familiar. He had soft brown hair, and green eyes which seem so familiar. “Why is everything I see or feel so familiar?” I ask internally making me frown.

“Axel” the head says, and I stare at him. How does this head know my name? Is he my dad or something, cause he looks like he could be --- except for the eyes and the hair.

“Um do I know you?” I ask raising one of my eyebrows.

“Yes Axel,” The head said. “but before you ask any questions, I’m not going to tell any major memories about you”

“Ok, but can I know something about myself” I ask clutching the rocks.

“Um you’re eleven, and you were born on November 19th”

“Ok, can you tell me who you are, and what connection you have with me?” I ask standing up and walking to the edge of the lake.

“I’m sorry no I cannot,” The head sighed “but I’ll tell you one thing. I’m happy that you survived the fall and I’ll talk to you later” the head said starting to fade away.

“Wait, who are you?!” I yell.

I clenched my teeth, throwing the rocks in my hand in the water. “I can’t stand this feeling! I mean the minute I get close to finding something out about myself, I don’t get it!” I screamed internally picking up anything in sight and throwing it. I want my memory back!

“Axel where have you been? I was worried sick!” Alma shouted when I walked back in the door.

“I went to the lake” I mumbled, still angered by that head’s lack of information.

“Oh, and you didn’t think to tell one of us!” She shouted and I sighed.

“I don’t mean to sound disrespectful Ms.Alma, but I woke up at 5 in the morning and I was bored” I explained trying not to make her even more mad at me.

“Oh so you were bored,” She yelled throwing her hands in the air “So what if I was bored and decided to pack up my stuff and leave!”

“Mom don’t take your anger out on Axel!” Eli snapped breaking his pencil in half. “It’s not like there’s anything to do in this house anyway, I mean there’s no TV, and the only thing you call entertainment is hunting!”

“Elijah, I will not be spoken to in that manner!” Alma yelled.

“Whatever I’m going to school,” Eli muttered slinging his book bag over his arm and grabbing his sketchbook. “And thanks for breaking my pencil!” He said sarcastically walking out of the door.

“I guess I’m going to school too” Olivia chimed in as she ran out the door.

I felt really bad after Eli snapped at his mom. It was my fault that he did it, and I deserved the chastisement after I did make her worry. So I feel I should apologize to Eli later on today. “Um Ms. Alma” I say, looking at her staring angrily at the paper.

“What Axel” She snaps making me flinch a bit.

“I’m sorry for sneaking out. I didn’t think I was going to start any trouble” I said, and the room fell silent. Did she accept my apology? I mean its good to forgive and forget, and plus it wasn’t even that bad.

“I accept your apology. Now come on, we’re going out” she growled getting up and I couldn’t help but be scared of her.