Hetalia Yaoi

Hamerica

America's POV

The light peeks through my curtains and right into my eye. Great, because everybody loves waking up just to be blind! But being the hero and all, I can fix this blinding morning! I can totally do it, bro! Watch me race down my apartment's hallway to the kitchen! (You're picturing me zooming down a hallway epically, right? Awesome, because that's definitely how it went down! I didn't trip over some clothes or anything! No, I didn't! You know what? If you're going to keep thinking I am a liar, then I will just stop telling the story! Oh, now you want me back? Fine, but only because a hero doesn't abandon their troops or stories!)

When I opened the refrigerator in my mini-apartment kitchen, something lunges out of the fridge and clings to my face! Ahhh! There's pickle juice in my eyes! Why!? Ahhh it burns!!! Wait, ok. I'm good now! But what was that? I take the object off of my face and analyze it. The object that attacked me was a (OHHH the drama! SUSPENSE!!) hamburger! Wait? A hamburger?

I analyzed the hamburger and saw that it has goggly eyes glued to the bun, so I couldn't eat it! The catastrophe! Eating glue is gross, and probably deadly, but I can't die, since I'm a country and all, so I'm all good, anyways! Well, bros, get this. The hamburger was ALIVE. Like, the goggly eyes look like it's staring into my soul! Creepy! I shiver from the thought.

The hamburger talks to me and says, "Look up Hamerica, America!"

"What's the magic word?" I taunt at the living hamburger.

"LOOK IT UP NOW OR DIE!" The hamburger yells.

I jump out of fear and decide to look it up. Oh boy was that a mistake. Some people stalk me and hamburgers! They even write FANFICTIONS about it! Interesting enough, the fanfics made me really want the hamburger...so I did somethings to it...and now we're dating...DON'T JUDGE INTERNET! He is a good burger! The best part is that I'll never have to live without him, Hamburger, since he's from McDonald's and hamburgers there last for like, ever!

The End!

And they lived happily, ever, after

... Until, AMERICA dropped Mr. Hamburger on the street...

... Mr. Hamburger was run over by a car and didn't make the impact. America was crushed ...

... Until, other countries started to feel bad for the country who lost their soulmate... and but him a new burger with glued Goggly eyes on the bun ...

... everytime America screws up the greasy McDonald's sandwiches the countries supply him ...

... because apparently America is attracted to hamburgers and I'm not judging!

(Hey guys! Thank you for staying! I know, I haven't updated in so long! But hey! I eventually got to it!! Anyways, so I decided to put a bit of humor in this story, since Hamerica is a ship about a HAMBURGER and America...! Also, the pickle juice in the eye...yeah this guy took my pickle from my lunch and put it over his eyes. Yeah, it apparently stung. :/ Well I hope you enjoyed! Also, I might be revising some stories! You know, to spice 'em up a bit! But I'll tell you when they get updated! Ok! So until next time! Bye!!

Or is it?

Dedicated to: hamburgers everywhere)