Rivetra weekend 2019

Chance

She had many chances to tell him. After so many expeditions they got over, whenever she would walk into his office to serve him tea or just casually start a conversation.

Many chances slipped through her slim fingers. If only she was braver. Or more reckless. Admiration and love, fear and passion. Feelings only making it worse for her heart and adding more and more pressure whenever she could spare a glance at him. Why him of all soldiers? Why him, the most untouchable one? Why it had to be him she fell in love with?

It would be so simple if he was a normal soldier, just like her. But he was her superior. If she confesses, he will transfer her to other squad for sure. She couldn't bare that. There wasn't only him she'll miss, Gunther, Eld and of course Auruo, and now Eren will be apart from her. Late laughts at night, drinks, talks, jokes, argues, all of that won't be in her life ever again.

Put away your feelings on expeditions, formal duties and when talking to him.

It was her moto. Shut them and keep quiet. But no one can resist the heart.

This is the last chance, she thought as she served him the last teacup before expedition. Still holding a shiny tray, she stared at him. When her Captain noticed it, he stared back.

"What is it?" he spoke in a softer tone than he would when someone would stare at him longer than three seconds.

"I want to tell you something, Captain. I..."

But her mouth went silent. Words didn't came out. Maybe her sane mind stopped them, who knows?

"No, it's nothing," she said.

"... If you say so," male said after a short pause and continued writing something down the paper.

"Sir," Petra saluted and went out, the sound of door closing was like a stab in her heart. The fastest she could manage, she stormed to her room.

That night, she shed a little bit of tears. She couldn't be stressed because of the expedition. She knew she made the right decision.

I'll tell him after expedition. When all struggles run past the Survey Corps, we'll settle what we're going to do with it. If he loves me or not, I'll finally know the answer.

As Female Titan charged towards her in abnormal speed and her body couldn't move, she thought just about one thing before blacking out forever.

I've gambled my chance away.