Holdin' On To You

4. Frozen

After what had been a long, grueling and confusing day in the studio, I was ready to head home and crash for the night. A yawn would escape my mouth every minute or two. A glass of wine, a bed and a pillow sounded like every bit of perfection. Keith was finishing up doing his thing with the producer, while I had discreetly decided to leave the premise. There was no time to try and figure out what was going on between Keith and I. My mind was too foggy with weariness of the day. Being a part of this project meant everything and more to me, but I never realized how much it would exhaust me. I wasn’t sure if maybe it was because of the exchanging of looks between Keith and I, or if the work itself was exhausting.

I quietly left the studio to catch some of the southern fresh air. It was a brisk air. For a moment I had stood there in silence thinking about the events that had taken place that day. For me to even believe for a moment that I could have a crush on Keith was a rarity in itself, but I wanted so desperately for it to be reality. Even if I hadn’t liked him, I could’ve easily persuaded myself to. These feelings had to be left aside though. Falling in love wasn’t an option for me, and much to my dismay; I had to keep it that way. The cold breeze had brushed against my face feeling refreshing, but giving me the cue that it was time to head home. My feet trudged to my truck before I heard a familiar voice coming from behind me. I spun around to see Keith’s face in the moonlight. I had instantly felt a fluttering oI f nerves dance around in my stomach. If only there was a way to put an end to it. “Hi…” I said in a hushed whisper.

His figure walked toward me silently. He came close enough to where I could see the entirety of his face. “You heading home?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Yeah, I think so. I’m pretty beat.”

Keith nodded. “You worked hard today. You’re perfect for this track,” he said in the most genuine tone.

How was it that I had been out of touch him? Was it merely my decision to do so? Was it both of ours? There was no telling what it was, but I was so happy that we were reconnecting; that he was still that sweet and humble man I had always known him to be. “Thanks,” I said shyly.

His smile lit up the night. “Of course, baby. I’m happy you’re working on it with me. I think we’ll make a great team.”

I smiled softly and nodded and his response. “Yeah, it’s already a lot of fun.” I couldn’t contain the fluttering in my stomach, which meant I had to escape in some sort of way. “Well, I should get to bed. I’m really tired. I need to be ready for the studio again tomorrow.”

Keith nodded. “Yeah, right. I should let you go. Sorry for keeping you. I just wanted to tell you that I’m happy we’re working together.” After he spoke, I let it drift off to silence only because I had no idea what to say. There was something soothing about the silence, but speaking to him was almost terrifying. Something about him scared me and I couldn’t pinpoint what it was. I bit down on my lip and shivered lightly at the wind that hit me in the face. Keith began to remove his jacket from his body and politely handed it to me. “You can borrow this. You look cold.”

I wasn’t so sure of what to do besides take the jacket. “Thanks,” I smiled and slowly slipped the jacket on over my body. A whiff of his scent took over my body like an intoxicating drug. It was indescribable to say the least. I played cool, but inside I knew I didn’t want that smell to leave. What was coming over me, and why was it happening so fast? I gave him a soft smile and began to turn toward my truck before he stopped me with his hand suddenly. My feet came to halt waiting to see what he had to say. I wasn’t going to fight it.

“Are you too tired to go for a walk?” he asked.

My eyes grew wide at his question. “Um, no, I guess not.”

Keith a smile and nodded, “Alright, shall we?”

I nodded and allowed him to lead me toward wherever we were going. I had no idea what to make of what was happening, but I wasn’t about to complain. I wanted to be next to him, and I wanted to smell his scent for just a while longer. The night was drawing to a close, but we still owned it as ours. We weren’t anything, but I was pretending for a moment that we could be, which was ridiculous. There was no way I would allow myself to get too close even if that was what I had wanted.

The majority of the walk was quiet, and we had somehow ended up by the river. I had observed him looking out at the skyline that lit up the night sky. His face looked peaceful and content. It was relaxing for me. “So…” I mumbled, wondering if conversation just wasn’t going to take place tonight.

Keith looked to me and smiled. “Sorry I’m not talkative. I take late night walks every night. I just get lost in the silence.”

I nodded. “It’s okay…”

He chuckled. “I’m so terribly boring…”

I shook my head. “No, no you aren’t boring. The silence is nice.”

He nodded. “It is nice. That’s why I come out here. It’s nice to forget about the noise.”

I looked at him confused, “The noise?”

He nodded. “Yeah, the noise of life and work. I appreciate silence.”

I pursed my lips and nodded. “Yeah, silence is golden…”

He gave a light laugh and smiled. “Yeah, something like that.

I wasn’t sure what it was, but I could feel a sense of tension between us as if we were both not telling each other something. I wanted to kiss lips, but I wouldn’t dare get that close, but I almost had a need to touch them. His presence was like ecstasy. His eyes looked toward me. Blue like the ocean was what they were. How mesmerizing they were. The moon allowed them to become more of a reflection of the ocean, or an iceberg. How could a human being have such perfection in their eyes? But that’s exactly what they were: perfection.

Without a hitch or an offbeat of a drum, his lips clashed into mine. My eyes grew wide, but they slowly closed so I could feel the intoxicating touch. My mind was forgetting that I wasn’t supposed to allow this to happen. I was far from listening to anything that was sane. Everything about my actions was reckless, but I didn’t seem to care. He was ecstasy, and I knew that after feeling his touch I was never going to be the same again. I was a changed person in that moment. The view of the skyline would have to beg for our attention. The world couldn’t even break up the kiss because the world was frozen. Time had stopped.