Through My Eyes

Chapter 4 - Present

“Crystal, please.  Please come tonight.  It’s going to be so much fun and you need the break.” 

I listened to Molly beg me over the phone to go with her and some friends to the movies tonight.  The latest teen horror flick was just released in theaters and they were all dying to see it.  I however, was not.

“Mol, I know you want to help me but a horror movie isn’t what I need right now.  Really, it’s okay.  I’m just going to stay home with Tyson tonight and hang out.  I am choosing to do this so no feeling guilty okay?”

I heard Molly sigh and could tell she was trying to think up another tactic to get me to go.  Obviously she didn’t come up with anything because she said, “Fine.  Stay home if you must but honestly Crystal, you’re going to have to rejoin the land of the living at some point.  You can’t allow him to still control everything you do.  He’s gone Crystal, he can’t hurt you anymore.”

While I knew everything she said was true, I still didn’t like hearing it, especially from her.  “I understand Molly.  It’s going to take time though.  I can’t just wake up one day and be magically recovered from what happened.  I was stalked, you remember that right?  I was stalked by a crazy psycho who had us all fooled until it was too late.  I hate him!”

Molly cleared her throat.  “Man Crystal, what I wouldn’t give to change what happened.  I hate him too.  I hate what he did to you and that he almost took you away from me.  I am in no way trying to tell you to forget what happened or whatever but just want you to know that he’s gone.  He can’t hurt you anymore.  I want you back.”

A tear formed in my eye.  I knew she was right.  I wanted to be back.  I wanted to be who I was before him.  I wanted to be able to feel the freedom of being a teenager again.  But the scumbag took it all away from me.  He took it and it can never be given back.

I was sitting on the couch with Tyson, watching some Kung-Fu movie when the doorbell rang.  I ignored it hoping whoever it is would go away.  When it rang for the third time, Tyson looked at me and asked, “Uh, aren’t you going to get that?”  Sticking my tongue out at him playfully I got up and went to the door.  I groaned when I looked through the peephole and saw who it was.

“Hi Mark,” I said as I opened the door. 

Sweet Mark.  He’s been there for me through it all.  He stuck by me through all the hell Jake put me through.  He never gave up.  I know he wants more from me right now but I’m not ready.  I may never be ready.

“Hey sweet girl.  I know I know.  Molly told me she couldn’t convince you to come tonight but I just had to try myself.  Won’t you please reconsider?  It might do you some good.”  He gave me the look that used to sweep me off my feet.  I still felt something but not like I used to.  Jake had killed so much in me.

“I appreciate it but no, I’m staying home tonight.  Tyson and I are watching this epic Kung-Fu flick.  I can’t leave now.” 

He gave me a quizzical look that told me he sees right through my lie but he didn’t say anything. 

“Kung-Fu huh?  That sounds better than horror.  Mind if I stick around then?  We haven’t hung out in a while.” 

My first reaction was to decline but something told me to let him in.  Even though I’m not ready to pursue anything serious, he’s still been a great friend and I honestly don’t know what I’d have done without him through all of this.

“Sure, that would be nice.  C’mon in.”  I stood aside to let him enter.  He came in and gave me a hug.  I stiffened at first but slowly relaxed into his gentle hold.  Surprisingly, it felt really good.

“I miss you Crystal.  I love you.  Don’t ever forget that,” he whispered into my hair.

I hugged him tighter and kept my head on his shoulder.  I still have no idea why he didn’t bolt away from me after everything Jake put me, and him, through but I’m glad he didn’t.  I just hope he can wait for me, wait until I’m ready to move forward.

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Authors Note:

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