His First Choice (A Twilight Story)

Difficult Feelings

The next few hours were difficult to say the least. While Carlisle discussed the best course of action with Sam, Jasper had taken the younger members of the pack out back with Emmett to help them better understand the newborns abilities. At first, I had been asked to help them outside - given my diet was the closest to the newborns we could get - but Alice had insisted that I needed to come along with her, Edward, and Bella to Bella's house in town.

The original idea was for Jacob to ask his father to lie to Charlie, Bellas dad, and offer Bella a trip to some local universities with Jacob's older sisters, but Billy hadn't felt comfortable involving his oldest children in the lie and Police Chief Swan probably wouldn't like his daughter spending the weekend alone with her boyfriend - even if his sisters would "be" there.

So the new plan was something the Cullens had relied on before - Alice wanted to have a sleepover. Alice had grown close with Bella while Edward had been involved with her. Of course, that closeness had dwindled the more Bella had grown close with Jacob and the less Alice was able to see of her future. It must have hurt Edward, I couldn't help but think. To watch as his future with Bella diminished more and more through Alice's visions. None the less, he had gotten her into this mess and I knew he felt it was his responsibility to get her out of it.

We took Bellas truck to her house. Edward and I rode in the truck bed carefully scoping the trees around us. He had come to protect Bella, and Alice had asked me to come because I had been in contact with Victoria more recently than the others and I would be able to pick her scent up quickly if she was near. For some reason I didn't believe Alice entirely. Whether it was because she didn't trust me around the dogs, or the fact that Victoria wouldn't come near Bella in the daylight, let alone come herself instead of sending someone else, or the fact that Alice had always pushed for Edward and I to make amends...there was definitely a hidden reason for her asking me to come along.

I sat silently across from Edward in the truck bed. He kept his eyes glued on the forest around us. It was at least a twenty minute drive to Bellas house from here, and with the speed her truck was going, it would be at least half an hour. The silence wasn't as bad with the rumbling of her truck engine drowning out my thoughts, but I couldn't stand the silence from Edward.

What are you thinking about? I thought silently to him.

His eyes shifted to me for half a second before he went back to staring at the trees. I sighed and tried again. He didn't look at me this time. I huffed and turned back to the trees that rushed past us. It was almost slow motion compared to the way they looked as I ran through them.

"Its my fault she's in this mess," he shook his head and looked at his shoes.

"She never should have gotten involved with our kind," I shrugged.

"Well, she did," he said sharply.

Because of you. I thought bitterly.

"It's not my fault," he stopped himself, "It isn't just my fault."

"What is that supposed to mean?" I shot back at him.

"Nothing, just... Let it go," he mumbled, "That's what you do with everything else anyways."

You know, I countered, If you didn't have some sick fascination with humans she wouldn't be in this mess.

"I would have never involved myself with her if it wasn't for you!" He hissed angrily.

"I would have never gotten involved with you if you had stayed in your place!" I shot back. "How was I supposed to know?"

"You did know! You asked me-" he stopped himself.

No. Go ahead. Say it. I felt sick to my stomach as I stared at him. Tell me it was my fault you manipulated me. Tell me it was my fault you turned me into a monster.

"That's not what I meant, Marceline," he sighed frustratedly.

"Then what are you saying?" I asked.

"You loved me, okay? I loved you. I was young and scared and alone and I loved you," he breathed quietly, "You asked to be mine and I gave it to you because I. Loved. You."

The silence that hung between us was deafening. The comforting roar of the truck engine did nothing to soothe the feelings that overcame me. I blinked in surprise and looked down at my hands. I heard the truck wheels pull over the gravel in Bellas driveway.

"I only involved myself with her because I didn't know if you would ever come back," he whispered as he jumped out of the truck bed.

I ignored the hand he offered to me and jumped out myself. He turned to disappear behind the house. He was going to her room to throw together everything she would need this weekend. I was supposed to keep watch near the side of the house while Alice went inside with Bella.

As Edward ran off towards the back of the small two-story house I focused on him as I thought.

I wouldn't have left you if I remembered, Edward.

He shot a glance over his shoulder and I caught the way his feet stumbled slightly before he completely disappeared from view. I sighed as I took my place in the trees.