23. How I Ended

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How I ended up stroking Killian Diesel's hair as his head laid on my chest a few hours later, I had no idea.

I just remembered shouting, touching and zoom, here we are. Laying in my bed, cuddling in quiet peace after another passionate round of lovemaking. Our breathing was by now controlled again and I sighed. I heard the fridge downstairs let out a loud growling noise and I felt Killian tense up.

"How you managed to be alone in this fucking house before I moved here and not already suffer from a heart attack will always be a damn mystery to me. You even jump when I say your name." His lazy and tired voice reached my ears. I stopped stroking his head and let out an amused breath.

"First of all, I jumped because you kept appearing out of nowhere. And old Barb is not just a house." I told him, slightly pulling on a strand of hair at the back of his head.

"You named your house Barb?" He asked, voice edged with amusement.
"Uhu." I nodded my head, even though he couldn't see it. Killian snorted.
"Always knew there was something wrong with you." He chuckled. I didn't feel offended.
"Coming from you, I take that as a compliment." I said before I could stop myself. I widened my eyes and my heart started to beat even faster when he lifted his head off my chest and turned his face towards me slowly.

"I-" I started, staring into his eyes, the light of the moon reflecting in them. A grin slowly made its way onto his face and I let out a breath of relief and shock. He looked so handsome in that very moment. His eyes were still glued on my face when he said the next thing.

"You're full or fucking surprises, aren't you Valery?" He shook his head before he leaned down to plant his lips on mine, taking my breath away. That was the first time he kissed me and it wasn't during, before or immediately after sex.

I felt his tongue move slow and gentle. I kissed him back, almost whining when he pulled away. Without another word, he laid his head back onto my chest. My heart warmed up and I started to stroke his hair again. Then I remembered what he said.
"Why do you insist on still calling me by my surname?" I asked, wanting to know that for a long time.

"Because it's basically a first name. I guess I'm just used to it. Besides, you look more like a Valery than a Belle." He said and as he did, hearing him say my first name sounded so unfamiliar coming from his mouth. He's only called me Belle a couple of times before and I didn't mind being Valery to him.
"Okay." I responded and heard him let out a breath.

"You're one of the only people that calls me Killian." He announced.
"But that's your name." I said with a laugh, feeling him shrug.
"My mom used to always call me Alexander. And others always called me Diesel." He told me and even though it wasn't a big deal to tell me about how people called him, it was a start. He was slowly beginning to trust me and it made me so happy.

"Alexander is your middle name?" I asked and he nodded, his ear brushing my nipple. I took in a breath.
"After my old man." He said, talking about his father for the first time.
"Do you still keep in touch with your dad?" I asked, trying to casually continue this conversation about his parents. I heard him chuckle sarcastically.
"Does it look like I do?" He asked, making me sigh. And we took it two steps back. We were back at the sarcastic answers. But I didn't let that discourage me.

"Well, that makes two of us." I said.
"Oh yeah, I forgot about your daddy issues." He snorted, making me gasp.
"I do not have daddy issues." I said, gripping his hair tight. He hissed and pried my hand away from him.
"Jesus, okay. Sore topic, I get it." He said, lifting his head to look at me. I glared at him and shook my head before turning away from him. I didn't think it was funny. His hand fell off my stomach and I felt him scoot away from me. My back was turned to him and I pulled the sheets over my body.

My eyes drifted closed after a few minutes of silence. But then, to my utter surprise, Killian Diesel started a conversation again.

"I never knew my dad." He said into the quiet room. My eyes widened and I turned to my other side, watching him lay on top of the sheets, his head resting on his arms as he laid on his back, looking up at the dark ceiling.
"He was some Serbian tourist that my mother met when she was at a concert. Nine months later I was here." He said and turned his head to watch me. I just blinked, not really knowing what to say. A small smile grazed his lips.

"Now you know more about me than anybody else. How does that feel?" He asked me and I bit my lip.
"Fantastic. I feel reborn." I exaggerated, making him look back up at the ceiling with closed eyes though, his mouth opened as he gave me a genuine wholehearted laugh.

My mouth parted in suprise at the new sound. I have never heard him laugh like that and I think I just wet my bedsheets again. I squeezed my knees together, closing my lips.
"You're something else." He commented after laughing before he glanced back at me. I blushed and bit back my smile.

"And you are full of compliments tonight." I stated, taking his statement as a compliment.
"Don't get used to it." He shook his head, smirking as he looked away from me again. Then he looked back at me, shook his head once more and looked back up at the ceiling with a more serious face.
"I wouldn't dare." I whispered, getting more comfortable in bed as I snuggled my face deeper into my pillow and closing my eyes.

I heard his head shift on the pillow and could practically feel his burning gaze on me. My breath hitched but I didn't open my eyes. I knew he would look away as soon as I did and he'd probably feel embarrassed and never do it again. But for some reason I wanted him to watch me. I wanted to comfort him and it seemed like it worked.

I fought hard to not fall asleep despite my already closed eyes. And after what felt like half an hour, I heard him move and a second later something brushed my cheek. I refrained from showing him that I was awake by gasping and was rewarded when I now felt him hovering above me as his finger left my cheek. And then I was ultimately rewarded.

His warm and soft lips kissed my cheek gently, almost as light as a feather. His hand now brushed some hair out of my face. He let out a breath afterwards, hitting my face. And then he was gone. The bed dipped and he sat up. I heard his feet hit the ground before he tried to slowly and quietly walk out of the room. Once he did and I felt my door squeak closed, my eyes shot open.

"Oh my God." I whispered into the pillow, muffling my quiet giggle as I couldn't help but feel wide awake after what just happened.

And Killian Diesel said I was full of surprises?

And Killian Diesel said I was full of surprises?

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