To Withstand the Force of Storms (A Loki Laufeyson Fanfic)

Chapter 8: Damaged Goods

"People fear leaving their safe harbor of the known and venturing off into the unknown. Human beings crave certainty-even when it limits them." -Robin S. Sharma

***

It's two thirty in the morning, and Loki is still presumably talking to Thor, but Annaka knows him better than that. Surely he went down to the burned building to investigate. It seems like inquisitiveness took place of his mischief. And who can blame him? It's a suspicious occurrence.

Preparing to find Loki and drag him to bed, Annaka sets off around the castle. Walking through the castle is always eerie, especially at night with limited lighting and strange noises. Although most Asgardians refuse the existence of ghosts or spirits, Annaka can't help but think that something is definitely lingering where it not ought to.

She checks the likely places first: the throne room, Thor's bedroom (nothing but a very loudly snoring Thor), the kitchen (Loki likes wine when he can't sleep), the outside balconies, and lastly, the dungeons. All she finds down there is a sleepwalking Leyna.

After guiding Leyna back to her own bedroom and being careful not to wake her, Annaka sits on a bench in the hallway, defeated. She isn't going to bother checking the unlikely places. Why would he be there?

Pulling her silk robe tighter around herself, Annaka heads back for her own bedroom, planning to wait up for Loki and demand an explanation. Annaka lies in bed, gazing up at the ceiling painted like the night sky and wonders if Loki is looking at something identical.

***

The sky is beautiful that night: all swirls of purple, blue, black, even green swim around, weaving in between stars and planets, galaxies and universes.

Tearing his gaze away from the sky, Loki continues up the dark, lonely mountain.

Loki didn't plan for it to take this long, but he underestimated how high he would have to go to reach his destination. 

Finally, after hours of climbing, Loki finds the cave with the correct symbols carved into the stone: a star, a sun, and a wave.

Peering inside, he squints against the blackness. At first he can't see a thing, and worry washes over him, but then a flicker appears in the deepest corner. Two rapidly blinking, blood red eyes stare back at him. He grins.

*

"Where have you been?"

Loki tries to look innocent. "I was out."

Annaka crosses her arms. "Out where?"

"For a walk around the castle."

Annaka narrows her eyes at him. "For four hours?"

Loki hesitates. He can't tell Annaka where he went; she'll get the wrong idea.

"I might've gone down to the fire scene," he lies. "I'm sorry. I just needed to know what happened."

"You don't smell like ashes."

"Well I wasn't exactly rolling around in them," Loki snaps.

Annaka sighs and rubs her temples. "Okay, sorry. I just got worried."

"I'm sorry, too. I won't do it again." Loki pulls her into a hug, kissing the top of her head. She hugs him back, resting her head on his chest and sighing again. "What's wrong?"

Annaka pulled away and kisses him swiftly. "Nothing, just tired I guess. You're cold." She touches the armor and leather of his outfit.

"It's a cold night," Loki says, leaning down to kiss her again. Annaka wraps her arms around his neck, raking her hands through his hair. Loki's hands travel down her spine, making her shiver.

Annaka pulls away; there's curiosity and also a hint of sadness in her eyes. "Where did you really go?"

"I told you."

"You lied."

"Would I lie to you?"

"Yes."

Loki runs a hand through his hair. "I haven't lied to you. What makes you think that?"

"You're cold, and you smell like nighttime,"

"Yeah, I was outside."

Annaka continues over him, "but the cold is almost too cold, like you were high off the ground. And you don't smell like town; it's something I can't identify."

Loki curses their frost giant senses. "Don't worry about me."

"So you did lie to me?" Annaka fumes. "Right to my face?"

"No, I--" Loki pauses. "It wasn't an entire lie."

"But it was still a lie." Annaka's eyes are starting to dichromate, making Loki a little nervous.

"I'm sorry," he says sincerely. "I didn't think you'd notice that I was gone so long, and I didn't think you would worry."

"Not worry?!" Annaka exclaims, exhaling sharply and feeling her eyes water. "All I do is worry about you constantly! It's maddening! I'm so paranoid that you'll slip back into your old habits and get yourself locked up for good or worse! Sometimes I feel more like your chaperone than your wife!"

Loki can only stare.

"And it's nerve racking for me because the last thing I want is for you to ruin your life because of some stupid mistake!"

"Annaka--"

"What if one day I come home and you're at the guillotine about to get your head cut off because you couldn't contain yourself?!"

"Love, listen--"

"I'm not saying you need to stop being so mischievous; that's the last thing I want! Your troublemaking was what I fell in love with. I just want you to learn to be responsible about it, own up to your mistakes, and not do things that will end you with a death sentence!"

"Annaka!"

"What?!"

Loki grips her shoulders, forcing her to look into his eyes. "Listen, I know what you're trying to say, and I bet that's the most terrifying thing for you, but you have to trust me. I know you've noticed a change in me since we got married, and it's a good change. I'm less likely to slip into old habits now. I promise you what I was doing tonight was purely harmless to me."

Annaka's pulse is erratic under Loki's cold fingers as they move up her neck to cup her face.

"I promise."

The honesty and sincerity in his eyes is enough to make Annaka cool down. She nods tightly, gripping Loki's hands with her own. She has to trust him. She has to at least give him a chance.

"Okay. I'm sorry I lost it."

Loki kisses her forehead. "It's alright. It happens to the best of us."

Annaka smiles slightly and kisses him lightly. "Come to bed; you look exhausted."