Chapter Nine- Tragedy... Can It Mean a Fresh Start?

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Oh my gosh. Oh.My.Gosh. Ohmygosh.

Wait. Back up ten years. My dad up and left us when I was three. He was done with us. Sunshine still remembers him, cause she was seven, but I don't really. He had a girlfriend, and they moved up to Connecticut. I talk to him on the phone about once a month or once every other month, but we don't talk about much anything except school and basic stuff like that. Last I've heard he's not in a good place.

Anyway. Back to the present. My mom is... Dead. Oh my gosh i just said it!! There was a car accident. She died an hour later in emergency surgery. I'll be staying with friends for a while, then they'll see if my dad is okay for me to live with...

**8:30 that night **

I'm packing a bag to take to my mom's friends house, and I'm not sure what to expect. I know she has a daughter about my age, but all girls my age think I'm an idiot. Sigh. I hear car tires turning into the driveway, and I know it's her friend, so I stuff a few last things into my bag, zip it shut, and slip into my Converse before bounding down the steps.

I slide into the backseat and we pull out. I stare out the window without a word. Sun was in the car with mom. She has a broken leg, but she'll be out of the hospital tomorrow morning. A single tear runs down my cheek, and I wipe it away quickly.

*************

2 long months of tears later...

Dad's not an option. Foster care. UGH! I'm like one of those kids in the stories, who people feel sorry for and get passed from home to home, unwanted. Nobody wants a teenager. They want the cute little innocent babies, not the scarred, broken teenagers. Right now, I'm in my favorite home so far. The care takers are a young couple, probably in their late 20's. They understand. Maggie (the wife) even said that her own mom died when she was 13, of cancer. She understands, helps me, instead of treating me like some injured puppy like the other 2 homes I've stayed in.

I have my own bedroom, with one of those peaked ceilings that I think are really cool. The walls are painted white and the bedspread is fluffy and white. The bed frame, nightstand, and dresser are black, and it has a cozy little purple chair in the corner, with a lamp.

After unpacking my clothes into the dresser, I change into pajamas and turn on my phone, opening BeFunky.

I post a picture explaining everything, about my mom, my anorexia, my cutting. Lots of supportive comments come in quickly, from cutiepieamy, puppylover321, vrc123, omgpop131, izabellaloveshorses, and more of my supportive friends. I thank them all, turn off my phone and the light, then slip into the white sheets.

***********

A monster. Chasing me. I'm running. It's dark. I keep running, but I need to catch a breath. I stumble, tripping over a dead branch. I fly through the air, then land painfully on the ground. I scramble back to my feet. I keep running. But then I reach a cliff. I look at the monster, then the cliff, scared. Finally, I leap off the cliff. But I don't land. I just keep falling, falling, falling...

************

I wake up with a start from the horrible dream. I look at the clock on my nightstand. It's 7:49. I pull myself out of bed and stretch, just as the door cracks open with a soft knock. Ms Maggie ("Just Maggie!" She's always saying) asks "Want some pancakes?" I grin and nod, for once paying attention to my hungry stomach.

*************

Another 2 months later...

I actually belong to somebody again!! It'll never be the same... I'll never have mom... But I belong!! I'm part of a family!! Maggie and John adopted me!! Just 3 days ago, the final paperwork went through. Today, we shop.

"Do you like your room?" Maggie wants to know.
"Well..."

An hour later were in a furniture store. I already love the black, square wood dresser, nightstand, and bed frame, but I pick out several sheets of stick-on fake diamonds to apply to the headboard, and a matching black wood bookshelf. Then, we move on to paint. I pick out a cool tangerine color for 3 walls, dark grey for 1. We go to Target next, where I pick new, crisp white sheets and a fluffy reversible bedspread- one side solid white, the other a white background with a small grey floral print. I also pick some room dećor- a lava lamp, posters, some little signs, little stuffed animals, and a few other miscellaneous things.

I'm good on clothes, but she lets me get a few things anyway- two pairs of pjs, a hoodie, a new pair of converse, spiky black combat boots, shorts, and some tops.

We're back home, with plenty of shopping bags. We brought everything home except the bookshelf, which will be delivered tomorrow. John shoos us out of the room as he moves and covers furniture to paint. That night, I sleep on a fold-out couch while the paint dries.

In the morning, I eat a slice of toast and two whole eggs, and I only get a small stomach ache. I resist the urge to throw it up.

After breakfast, John leads me to my new room, opening the door with a flourish. Three words: It.Is.Awesome.

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