The Art of Becoming Stridersexual (Homestuck JohnDave)

Chapter 5

You are now John Egbert.

"What. The. Fuck."

The words escape from your mouth before you can stop them, but you hardly even notice. You're so lost in your thoughts that you stare right through the fumbling Dave sitting before you, who doesn't need to be so focused on avoiding your gaze, as you're not noticing any of your surroundings at the moment.

So many thoughts are running through your head, you don't know which one to attend to first. The most prominent of them all is confusion, but for all the wrong reasons. You should be confused because your best friend just kissed you, but you're not, and that's exactly why you're confused.

Dave's lips on your lips, his chest on your chest, it should've been weird, but for some reason, it wasn't. Actually, it felt very, very right, like you'd been expecting it all along.

But even more confusing than that, you find yourself wanting to kiss him again.

But that would mean... no, you couldn't be... but then again, why else would you want to kiss Dave?

And slowly, piece-by-piece, your thoughts come together and lead you to one massive realization: you have fallen for Dave Strider.

The sudden understanding hits you like a ton of bricks. Not because you're surprised, but because you're finally understanding that this is exactly what you wanted, exactly what your subconscious always knew would happen. You almost feel stupid for not realizing it sooner.

You blink and return back to reality. Dave has moved from where he was sitting and has taken to pacing across the small room. Ready to tell him what you should've been able to long ago, you open your mouth to speak, but close it immediately when he turns to face you.

Before you can even register his extremely distraught expression, Dave holds up a hand to stop you from speaking. "Don't say anything, please, just give me a second," he begins, pain evident in his voice. "I don't know what came over me. But I do know that I'm sorry, John. I'm so sorry, and I totally understand if you don't want to be friends anymore."

He waits expectantly for your response, looking almost scared, unable to say more. Why he would be scared of what you have to say, you're not quite sure. "Sorry? Why are you sorry?"

"Why am I sorry?" What seems to be anger flares behind his words. Not anger at you, anger at himself. "Because I just kissed you, John! Because I'm your best bro, and bros don't do that! Because I just ruined our friendship!" He sighs, and the anger is replaced by remorse. "I didn't mean to put you in a position like this, Egbert. I know you're 'not a homosexual,' blah blah blah, and I don't expect you to be, so I shouldn't have done that."

You pick your words carefully before answering. "Maybe I'm not a homosexual," you say, "but I guess I could be... Stridersexual?"

Now Dave is the confused one. "What do you mean?"

"I mean..." you struggle to find words to convey your emotions. "I mean that I never thought I liked guys, and I still don't think I do- I only like one." You close your eyes so you don't have to see Dave's reaction. "What I mean is, I really didn't mind when you kissed me, and I wouldn't mind if you did it again."

You open your eyes cautiously, and see a rare sight. Dave, the coolest kid in cooltown, has no idea what to say. After opening and closing his mouth several times, like a platinum-blonde fish, he finally settles on an appropriate response. "Really?"

You smile at his reference to what you know is his favorite movie: Shrek. With a sort of giddiness bubbling up inside you, you answer him appropriately. "Really really."