Because Sometimes Opposites Attract - Draco Malfoy Fanfic

Chapter 27

When I was once again sending a letter to Corey on the owl tower, one that was full of lies, telling him that I was still happy here because I didn't want him to worry, I found a little note next to Poppy. I gave her letter I wanted to send and let her fly out into the night sky. Then I unfolded the little piece of paper and read it. For a moment, my heart stopped.

Sam, can we talk? Just write a date and time on this note and leave it where you found it, I'll check on it as soon as I get back here. I have something to get off my chest and you're the only one I can tell. I know this is so much to ask after everything that has happened but I really need you and it's important. You'll hear a reason, I swear, I wouldn't ask you if there was any other way. - Draco

I couldn't believe it. I had been trying to get over him at least a little and now this. What did he want? It wasn't about me, there was a problem and he wanted my help, that's why he needed me. I felt weak for wanting to help him after everything he had put me through but I didn't want to let him down. After all, I was still there for him instead of just letting him deal with his own shit. But I didn't care about being weak and it was impossible for me to do anything other than pick up the pen and write date and time on the back of it. He could rely on me, no matter what happened.

All of next day, I thought about the night. I had written down the same time we had always met at up on the owl tower before. And I was going to be there early so he wouldn't get the feeling that I was just messing with him by saying I'd be there and then not showing up. I didn't want him to feel like he could not count on me. It was so fucked up that I still didn't want him to feel bad.

I wasn't early. He was there before me, sitting on the ground underneath the window. I crossed the room and sat down next to him. "What's wrong?" I asked softly and he put his arm around me with his hand on my shoulder. I rested my head against his shoulder and he pulled me closer. It felt so wrong but at the same time, it was so right. "I wanted to tell you why I was crying when we first met up here." I blinked quickly, I was really interested in that but I had just assumed I would never find out.

"Go ahead, I'll listen" I encouraged him with a smile and he looked at me with those cold grey eyes. "I haven't seen you smile in a while, I miss it. It keeps me going." I looked away, blushing a little but he probably couldn't see that in the dark. "When you came up here that night, I had just read a letter from my father..." He stopped and I waited. "I'm gonna tell you something that might freak you out but I don't want you to be scared." I took a deep breath, I was prepared for anything, simply because he was holding me in his arms. Nothing scared me like this.

"Potter was right the whole time, Dumbledore too. You know, about how..." My eyes grew wider and I shivered. "You mean about ... he...?" Draco closed his eyes and started nodding slightly, looking down. "Yes, he's back" he whispered. I gasped. "How do you know that?" "My father, my parents, my whole family, they're ... part of his army." A tear ran down his cheek. I put my arm around him and wiped the tear away. I was trying to comfort him for once.

"What about you?" I asked, scared of the answer. I couldn't believe that I wasn't running away because I was scared. This was the real deal, it was all theory that he was back and it was all about what could happen but this was real. The fucked up thing was that I wouldn't run away even if he told me he was like his parents now. 

He took a deep breath and pulled me closer. He sounded so desperate when he answered. "Not yet ... but my dad told me in his letter that ... I had to follow their lead" he whispered. My heart was pounding faster and I felt that his was too. 

"I can tell you're scared, Sam and it means the world to me that you're still sitting here so close with me even though I've told you this. You're amazing." He pressed his lips together. A tear escaped my eye. He looked at me, locking my eyes. "That's the reason we can't keep going like before, I mean, it's the reason I'll never be able to be with anybody. It's not about me and my friends, I don't care about them one bit. It's the fact that I can't do this to you, I am becoming like my parents. I'm so scared." 

He was shaking. "I can't do anything about it, if I had a choice, I would be on my knees already right now, begging you to just run away with me. But that's not an option. And I know you couldn't do this, you're scared too. Trust me, I don't want this, I don't want to follow him, believe me. But it's what I'm supposed to do, it's my family and they're all I really have. Do you understand me now? You can add that to all the other reasons I've told you. It's only me, not you. I'm fucked up and I can't help myself." 

I was crying by now. Running away with me? Had he really just said that? I looked up into his eyes. "Why can't we run away?" I whispered desperately. "They'd find me and it would make things so much worse, I wouldn't risk putting you in danger like that. You should know how much I appreciate the fact that you came up here to meet me, seriously, I know I don't derserve it after everything I've done to you so I don't take it for granted. You're the best friend I've ever had, you're there for me no matter how much I fuck up. I had to tell you this, you're the only one I trust. And I know that everyone's giving you shit, I know how much that must hurt. I'm so sorry because it's my fault. I should've never started this in the first place but I don't regret it because ... I'm selfish." "Let's run away" I cried quietly. He smiled weakly. "I couldn't mess up your future like this. You deserve someone that can keep you safe and make you happy, not constantly fuck you up. I mean, what do you want to do with your life? I'd be in your way."

When I told him about my plans that I had also shared with Neville, he pulled me even closer. "You're gonna achieve that, Sam. You can do anything, you make everything better." He looked down at me and locked my eyes. "I have to hold myself back so much to not kiss you right now" he whispered. "Just don't hold back then" I replied and put my hand into his hair, pulling his face down to mine. He put his hands on my sides, pulling me onto his lap. Then he kissed me, kissed me desperately. We were both crying now because we both knew that this would be our last kiss, ever.