"YOU TALK!" Hinata scooted to the back of the bed.
"AHH I TALK"
"YOU'RE A TALKING TIGER!"
"IM A TIGER- oh yeah, now I remember... actually, I'm not a tiger. I'm a highly intelligent species of potato, a species of which has started to push the boundaries of potato tech- ok bad start." Probably shouldn't have said that when there is a trained ninja from my favorite show pointing a sharp stick of my throat.
"Rawr." She leapt back again.
"Ya kNoW, I would call you a pussy for being so scarred, but I AM a badass talking tiger who is fly as fuck, and the best at cracking open a cold on with the boys- ok I'll stop now." Caity sat there staring, doing her damn best (which isn't very much) to ignore the pain in her ass cause she's a little bitc-
"Who are you?! Where are you from?!" Hinata looked at Caity with a firm eye.
"Oh, I'm sorry madam, I forgot to introduce myself. I am Caity Deroe, and I am simply one hell of a meme lord tiger. The most amazing American from Canada tiger you will ever meet!"
Suddenly, (and unexpectedly) the bamboo was pushed threateningly close to her throat.
"Who is this.... meme you call your lord!? Do they want anything to do with Konaha?!"
"hehe.. heheh AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH"
Caity laughed, and Hinata felt threatened. There was a talking feline in the room, bleeding out, and laughing like a damn psycho. Well if this is a day to fucking remember-
"Meme is a thing, not a person! A meme lord is someone talented in the way of memes, the almighty power. Stronger than any power ever discovered... and I, Caity Deroe, am the greatest meme lord to ever crack open a cold one with the boys..."
Stronger than any power... any power... really? That strong?
"S-so it- it's... stronger than a-anything? E-even... byakugan? Is it a- a k-k-kekkei gen-genkai, o-or is it learnable?"
These weren't questions you asked if you wanted to kill someone, right? Right. Unless Caity is totally wrong and her ass is getting murdere-
"Ah. You want to learn. To surpass your cousin? Neji, yeah he's a real di- WOAH BACK UP PRINCESS!!!"
Despite being scared shitless and probably scarred for the rest of her life, Hinata moved her weapon of choice forward and Caity fell back so she didn't get kebabbed like fresh steak off the grill.
"H-how d-did you know tha-at!?"
Maybe if I keep bluffing I won't die...
"Tsk tsk young one... uhm, duh!? Meme lord? All knowing? Did you not get any of that-" sassiness killed Harambe right here.
Too far?
Aw fuck it I'm a tiger now, I can say whatever the fak I want! Insert z snap here!
"Can you please remove the sharp organic pole you are holding to my throat away. This really hurts my back and I think I'm gonna pass out from blood loss again. I pulled yo ass inside, bitch, help me!" I think it's better she doesn't know I'm human... yet...
"O-oh! Sorry, i-I'm so stupid I forgot to fix I-"
"Girl shut yo negative ass up, you're fabulous, rule number one of being a boss ass bitch which is required to become a meme lor-" thump.
Aaaaand I'm out again.
YOU ARE READING
Striped
Fanfiction"Yooooouuuu son of a bitch!" "You tell him girl!" Who would win? One, doughy fuck sack? Or one timid-y gurl? "Hey gurl, do you know da Wae?" Caity has recently moved to Canada, but instead of being met with ice skating and maple butter, she's met wi...
