//twenty seven - so messed up in the head//

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Lane's POV

I woke up the next morning on the couch and cradled in Josh's arms. Tyler and Jenna were in a similar position on the other couch and the screen of the T.V. was still lit up. We spent hours just watching movies and laughing. It felt great to be doing nothing. I rolled from Josh's grip carefully and walked into the kitchen, turning on the coffee pot before walking up to my room. My phone was still on the floor next to my bags from where Pete called me last night. I still had his hoodie on too, draped carefully over my shoulders and going far past my own hands. 

I slipped it off and hung it in my closet before grabbing my phone from the carpet. There, I saw a name I had almost completely forgotten about. 

Andrew: hey, haven't heard from you in awhile. Is everything okay?

I had talked Andrew a lot the day in LA after leaving the coffee shop, but what he didn't know is that when I stopped texting him, it was because I was sprinting towards my nearest escape. Guilt made my blood go cold as I stared at the screen. 

Lane: hey, a lot happened that night. I wasn't ignoring you, i'm sorry

I left it at that, hoping he wouldn't ask me to go into detail. He was a nice kid, one who could talk about both the stupidest things and the most amazingly interesting things in the universe. And the way he looked at her in the coffee shop, not like she was an object for him to obtain but a soul to gain the trust of, made her smile wider. She didn't want to lose Andrew over her ridiculous mind. With her thoughts finally draining out, her phone buzzed into her palm. 

Andrew: i hope you're okay. we can talk about it if you want, i could pick you up and take you out?

Lane: you're back in Ohio?

I thought he was still in LA helping family, but the idea of going out with him was addicting. 

Andrew: yea, got back a day or two ago

I gulped as I read the text, the opportunity to actually go out with someone like him in front of me. I never got to date before. Guys were too scared of my story, except Alex, but it was never anything like that for us. We were siblings through and through. 

Lane: then of course, i'd love to go out. when do you want to go?

From there, we decided on a time and I walked back down the stairs to three groggy and coffee-sipping family members laying around the room. "Good morning," I said as I walked down the rest of the steps carefully. "Hey sweetie," Tyler said as he walked from the kitchen and met me at the stairs, pecking me on the head then walking back to Jenna. "So, do you remember that Andrew kid from LA?" I asked the room, twiddling with my fingers and staring at the ground as I waited to ask Tyler if I could go. Josh and Tyler both nodded before Jenna looked at me confused. "Kid from a coffee shop at their acoustic set," I said quickly before getting back to the point. "Well, he asked me out and I might have already said yes." Tyler spit his coffee back into his cup as Josh laughed and Jenna smiled at me. 

"Lane!" Tyler said, still choking a bit. "Are you sure you can handle a date right now? We just got back from travelling and you had an anxiety attack last night. And you just went through a lot-" he rambled, worry obvious on his face. "Dad!" I shouted, making him look up at me and realize he was babbling. "I'll be okay, I promise." He sighed and nodded his head, giving me a small grin before I thanked the three of them and ran upstairs to get ready. 

I pulled on a pair of black leggings and cropped sweater before moving into the bathroom and fixing my hair. It had been in braids so I untangled my blue mane before parting in correctly and shaking it out, hoping that it would suffice. My makeup was simple and minimal. By the time I was finished getting ready and pacing around, a knock at the door sounded. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and a voice at the door welcoming someone in. In a few seconds, Tyler was at the doorway, grinning at my nervous pacing. "You know you're gonna be fine, right?" I glared at him but held back my smile. He came over to me and hugged me, making my nerves partially fall away. "Thanks Dad" I whispered into his chest before pulling away, grabbing my bag, and making my way down the stairs where Andrew was casually talking to Josh and Jenna. Our eyes met and we both smiled. 

"Hey," Andrew said happily. I smiled and waved as I made my way down the rest of the stairs/ In a few short minutes we were off, ending up in a grassy patch in a near by park. We were laying in the grass, staring up to the sky in awe. The clouds were minimal but the ones that were there for fantastic. A little while longer into the quiet, Andrew broke the comfortable silence. "Lane?" he asked quietly as I hummed a 'yes.' "What happened that night?" With those few words, I froze. I sat up from the position I was in and avoided his eyes. I didn't want to tell him, but I also didn't want to hide it. 

"I made a mistake, a terrible mistake" was all I could muster before I felt burning in my eyes and a heavier thump in my chest. I felt a hand guide its way up my back, rubbing small circles into it like Brendon always did when I was upset on tour. "You don't have to talk about it, but you can if you want to." I turned to look at him and saw the genuine care in his eyes. I could trust him, I could trust this. 

"My mom, before she died, wrote a letter. I read it that night and found out that she was actually running away that night and leaving me behind. I felt so unnecessary, so I ran to the nearest bridge. Tyler, Pete, and Brendan ran after me but I relapsed badly before standing on the platform," I looked over expecting a look of horror, but he surprisingly looked almost unphased, just a hint of worry and sadness. "I almost died from blood loss, but they found me just in time and I spent a week in the hospital in LA. That's why I got back yesterday and not a week ago." I looked down to the grass and played with it between my thumb and pointer finger. "It wasn't me ignoring you, it was me ignoring everything other than the mistake I almost successfully made." I felt his hand stop making the circles and leave my back. Soon enough, I felt his fingers under my chin pushing upwards so I could look into his eyes. 

"I'm glad you're still here, and I understand why you wanted to. But, never again okay?" I nodded and gave him the smallest, saddest grin I could muster. He wiped a tear I didn't know was there from my eyes and let his thumb linger on my cheek. We stayed like that for a long time, his hand placed gently on my face and our eyes searching each others. "I want to be able to know your whole story, and you to know mine" was all he said before I smiled and he moved his hand, looking down with a grin. I felt good about him, about us. 

a/n: starting to wrap the book up but i'm leaning towards a sequel so yea. ALSO WE BROKE 1k WHICH IVE NEVER DONE.

song for this chapter is the band super whatevr that i've talked about a lot but monday i saw them open for sum 41 and after their set i got tattooed by their guitarist and talked to him for like two hours about life and shit and it got deep and personal and amazing and i love this band so much. have a great day guys |-/

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