How These Floorboards Creak

1

Alfred was silent for the entire ride. Not that it made much of a difference in the rowdy bunch he had sitting the car. There was a mix of complaining and whining and just regular chatter about nonsensical and irrelevant things. Toris, next to him, gave him a sorry look. Alfred won't outwardly admit that it helps but it really does. Toris is and always had been a huge help. 

He adjusted his grip on the steering wheel with a sigh. They were almost at the house and he was grateful for that. Another god-forsaken hour with all these whining assholes would drive him to absolute madness. He was like a glass just teetering over the edge. He could already tell this was going to be a long couple of weeks. 

Slowly, he sped up the car so no one noticed. Before he hit the brakes, he glanced at Toris and mouthed a 'get ready'. Toris got the message and stiffened up, clearly bracing himself for impact. With a smirk, Alfred hit the breaks hard. He heard a few grunts and one shriek. He tried hard to keep the straightest face possible. He glanced at Toris again and saw him shaking with a crooked smile on his face. He was trying hard to suppress a laugh. Just with that, Alfred felt triumphant. He turned around and looked at the disjointed countries. He bit back a laugh. 

"We're here." He announced with the slightest bit of a smile. Promptly after, he got out of the car. His message was clear and the other nine stepped out. 

"When was the last time you came here?" Toris asked him with a slight chuckle. They stood side by side with familiarity, both looking at the faded yellow house. The wooden stairs caving in slightly. The porch dirtied by time, with white rocking chairs adorning it. The garden was starting to grow into it not that he really minded all that much. A fairly big wood door with a screen door covering it's masterful beauty stared back them. 

"Last week, I had to clean it up a bit." Alfred shoved his hands in his jacket pockets. "It was so dusty, I damn near triggered my allergies." 

"I could have helped."

"Yeah, but it really didn't take long." He both metaphorically and quite literally shrugged off Toris' worry. "It was a one man job this time."

"Where exactly are we?" Francis butted in, looking at the old house with pure confusion. Which wasn't much of a surprise. "This looks like an old man's home."

"Well, it is my home."

"You're not that old though." Toris furrowed his brows at Alfred. 

"I feel old." Alfred shrugged again and turned around to address the other nations. "Welcome to my humble abode. This here old girl is where you'll be staying for a few weeks. I, of course, need to tell you the rules first."

"Rules?" Kiku spoke up, tilting his head slightly. The guy was always so cat like, it was admittedly cute. 

"I have five rules." Alfred held up a hand. "Number one." All fingers dropped except his thumb. "Always take off your shoes when you get inside." His pointer finger shot up alongside his thumb. "Number two; no fighting." His middle finger joined the small party. "Number three; the attic is off limits." Now his ring finger shot up. "Number four; the basement is also off limits." Lastly his pinky. "Number five; if there's a problem or you have a question about something go to either me or Toris, here." He dropped his hand. "Got it?" All nodded. "Alright, then let's head in." 

It took him an irritating hour to show everyone to their rooms. Ludwig was simple. Feliciano, oddly simply, yet a bit too talkative. Lovino slightly more annoying. Kiku was nice and quiet which Alfred was grateful for after the fiasco that was Francis and Arthur fighting over who had the better room even though Alfred took the utmost time and care to make each room accommodate each nation specifically. Ivan was only irritating for the fact that Alfred's suspicions towards him never actually went away after the Cold War. Neither did Ivan's, clearly shown by the murderous look they shared. At least it was mutual.